Had to put my little fox terrier to sleep on Saturday. Even with other dogs in the house, it's uncomfortably quiet here today and I am feeling the loss.
Gahhhh @Karen W. There are no words to express my sympathies. My baby is starting to have a hard time walking so his days are numbered too. I can not even imagine what you are going through right now.
KarenW. My deepest sympathy darling. I know your heart is breaking. Hugs sweetie. No words I can say to take away the pain I'm sure you're feeling. It's just hard.
Thanks Lady. He was 16. We rescued him 11 years ago. He was all terrier and a scrapper to the end. He was physically healthy, but his eyesight was getting worse and worse and he'd been starting to fall down (and up) the steps, he couldn't see the end of the bed or sofa and would fall off. He would see a blur of the other dogs coming near him and attack (luckily no serious injuries, but I had to monitor constantly). It was the right thing to do, but heartbreaking. He is missed.
Awwww what an adorable little nugget!!! I am so happy to hear that he had such a long and happy life with your family, and thank you for giving him a loving home. I hope that you can find some sense of peace during this heartbreaking time.
Sugarhugs to you Karen. I had 2 put 2 of my beloved down at the same time last year and I cried all day and it was very quiet at home with the other 2 but the other 2 were so sick and I'll they were cranky and lashing out on theothers so when they last 2 realized it was just them there was a bit of peace and calm in the house because the ones in pain had passed on.
Losing a furry kid is never easy, very sorry to hear about your loss Karen. Glad you have other dogs in the house, even though everyone is special and unique. Peace to you.
Oh Karen, I have a min fox terrier and she is a darling.....I am so sorry sweetie. Losing pets is so heart breaking as you love each other unconditionally <3 to you
What a gorgeous boy. Thank you for sharing these Karen. I created a memory box of my girls and we put their picture as phone wall paper in tribute to them. It helps to ease the loss and pain.
Currently debating how I should approach a situation with one of my best friends, because her boyfriend sucks!!! It's been building up but we go together like oil and water. Want to plan a vacation get together and I don't think I can go with him. I wouldn't be able to avoid him as much as I like, and I also I don't want my having to appease everyone to ruin MY week of vacation because I am annoyed and can't voice it.
If it's your best friend, it's probably OK to just say the things as they are, with kindness and respect, so it's all out in the open. There is a way to say these things with respect and compassion. If you can find the right words, be apologetic to your friend, even if you feel you don't owe an apology, I think it is OK to just state how you feel and not to hold her responsible for your discomfort around this man.
Yes, methinks Sophie is correct. Just say the two of you dont hit it off, no one's failt, kust 2 differemt personalities. And good luck and let us lnow what happens.
Jessi that just sucks. I feel for you. My HS friend started dating this guy I just hated and we stopped being friends purely because I just drifted away to avoid him. They were married for 15 yr before she finally wises up. Girl has an IQ of 145 but she couldn't figure out he was a loser (He apparently was unable to keep a job and she said he probably worked a total of 6 months in all that time.) I hope your friend wises up sooner.
I'm watching a Bizarre Foods marathon and enjoying my Pres Days holiday. A friend wants me to join her for potluck lunch and don't even want to leave the house. Sorry for those experiencing snow. The weather has been spring like in San Francisco.
Sherry, it's been bitterly cold in Ohio for several days and expected to remain frigid throughout the week.
I think Saturday it was something like -8 with a wind chill of -27. Crazy stuff. Oh, how I long to be sitting (or more like standing) in the Buena Vista Cafe with an Irish Coffee right about now.
I went to a seminar for my Master's and it was very encouraging. Then I went for dinner at my friend's and had a nice girl chat. This degree was the best decision I ever made.
Congrats @Sophie Helene! Going to graduate school was the best decision I ever made. Soak in every minute until your ass gets kicked back out into the big scary real world out there! ;)
Jessi I feel for you I do I had best friends when I moved to Vegas we spent all our time together. 1 got a shittyyy boyfriend who made her do horrible things to him in public gambled all the time with her money. Pocketed the winnings and just oops oh well if he lost. Gave her herpes Which she flat out denied to our face he gave her but it was all over her mouth. He insisted on Not using condoms. He openly cheated on her in the tiny casino that they worked at but she still stuck with him because she wanted a boyfriend and I guess he had her convinced she'll never do better. I took the soft line and tried to point out slyly all his bad doings but she brushed them off as me being jealous of her having a boyfriend and me being single. So I finally tried to put my foot down and pointedly say all the shittyyy things he does to her and she cut me out. We were bff for 2 years. Never heard from her again. She eventually dumped him when she ran out of her grandfather's trust fund that she was living off of but I never heard from her. my other friend got a controlling bf Too and we drifted..
Moral is Jessi maybe just stand back and let this play this self out.. if you think he won't be around long. If she's completely crazy for this guy she'll choose him and not forget that you didn't support her.. maybe just give this guy just enough rope to hang himself. .anyway you can slyly gaslight him??? Just a thought
Been there done that. You can only say so much and then you have to leave it unless you find out something bordering on dangerous. I have also been proven wrong so you have to keep an open mind. But I had a friend who started dating a man whose ex accused him of physical abuse but she also heard the same rumours and he was otherwise douchey so I did gently bring it up, even the men in our group detested this guy and some of the other friends said something more bluntly than myself but she realized she made a mistake and broke up with him, it was a messy breakup but she apologized and appreciated that we had tried to warn her. She thought he had changed but he showed his true colours eventually. At least we tried.
Ugh. Need advice. Been friends with a guy for over 10 years, we also have dated a few times over the years and remained friends through out. We always flirt/talk about hooking up and I started to get feelings for him - so I told him. He tells me he has a GF! How did he fail to mention this? So I tell him I need a break from our daily chats and that i'll contact him when I'm ready to talk - which I did today. It wasn't awkward until he starts sending me photos (just normal photos) of himself and I asked him to stop, and said that given our "misunderstanding" that for now, even though I love seeing his pictures, if he could refrain from doing so. Was I rude in asking this? We live on other sides of the country so we generally communicate through email/txt and he hasn't replied and he always replied right away.
OMG I went through something similar some years ago. We had a flirtatious friendship for a while, and then he had a gf and did not tell me. Men are not girls, they don't know how to handle situations like this, so you have to be the bigger person and hide your disappointment and move on! Don't worry about him not replying, he will eventually. Just wait for a while, let your feelings die down, and when you are ready send a friendly email at the next birthday/Xmas/ Hannukah/grad/whatever. You just need to wait long enough to reboot the friendship. It's not as much a big deal as you feel right now: you are just upset and disappointed, and it's normal.
Sorry for the second post but just wanted to add that men feel easily rejected. If you asked him not to send photos and told him you are upset he is not going to move towards you until he is invited. He is probably super confused and thinking he'd rather be quiet and avoid sending/saying something wrong to upset his friend (you) again. They generally don't like to make us unhappy.
Sophie Helene I think you totally nailed it. Gina a second text explaining why it was difficult for you to see him, carefully worded may be able to get things back on track but let it rest for a few days to fully think it out. Good luck. Let us know how it turns out.
Maybe Jessi's friend's boyfriend is not a bad guy, maybe he's just an acquired taste. We can't like everyone right off the bat, and there's nothing wrong with someone who's perfectly fine for someone else not being your cup of tea. If we accept without explanation that sometimes we meet people we just "click" with, then we should also accept that sometimes we meet people that rub us the wrong way, for no definable reason. It just is. So if he's not a bad guy, just someone you'd rather not hang around with, then either see her without him (which probably means no joint vacations), or find a way to see him through her eyes enough to tolerate time with him. I know plenty of people who are socially awkward (like me), who don't always make good first/second/third impressions but are worth the effort. I also know people who are engaging and pleasant right away but eventually prove themselves to be shallow and destructive. So if it seems he's decent to her, but you just don't care for him, start a conversation about what it is that draws her to him (not asked in a skeptical way but in a curious way), and maybe you'll come around on him, enough for group activities anyway. If you don't like him because he treats her badly, then do your best to make your time with her a bf-free zone, so you aren't sucked into the drama and still have her as a friend when she reaches the conclusion you already reached. Good luck.
Pray forme, i at American Girl dll store with 4 granddaughters!! And even tho they're mothers are with the - 2 mommies- it is pretty hectic!!! I am hiding out by the bathroom.
It is 2 floors of dolls and their accessories, with about 150 girls btwn 4to 12. U can also get the dolls hair done, ears pierced and go to doll hospital!!! Still hiding on bench, and i found some pretzels in my purse. They prob for kids, but screw them, lol
Made Moroccan chicken for lunch and am finishing up baking the rest of the peanut butter cookie dough we made last week. That worked out great. We made a huge batch of dough, made a couple dozen cookies and then foil wrapped the dough and stuck it in the fridge for later. Today after lunch IS later ;)
Supernatural marathon is on, but I'm gonna switch over to watch the latest installment of Black Sails and see what those hot pirates are up to.
This Girl Scout keeps coming to my door asking for $3.50, but I think it's really the Loch Ness Monster.
ReplyDeleteGetting snowed in as I type....but there is a Homicide Hunter marathon on ID (with that hottie who play Lt. Kenda) so all is good in the world :)
ReplyDeleteLots of snow. Daytime TV sucks, so wasting time online and reading a book.
ReplyDeleteHad to put my little fox terrier to sleep on Saturday. Even with other dogs in the house, it's uncomfortably quiet here today and I am feeling the loss.
ReplyDeleteGahhhh @Karen W. There are no words to express my sympathies. My baby is starting to have a hard time walking so his days are numbered too. I can not even imagine what you are going through right now.
DeleteHuge HeisenHugs to you sweetie, stay strong.
Aww I am so sorry for your loss Karen.
DeleteKarenW. My deepest sympathy darling. I know your heart is breaking. Hugs sweetie. No words I can say to take away the pain I'm sure you're feeling. It's just hard.
DeleteSo so sorry Karen! Sending big hugs!!!!!
DeleteThanks Lady. He was 16. We rescued him 11 years ago. He was all terrier and a scrapper to the end. He was physically healthy, but his eyesight was getting worse and worse and he'd been starting to fall down (and up) the steps, he couldn't see the end of the bed or sofa and would fall off. He would see a blur of the other dogs coming near him and attack (luckily no serious injuries, but I had to monitor constantly). It was the right thing to do, but heartbreaking. He is missed.
DeletePhotos of my little guy:
JJ1
JJ2
Aw, Karen W, what a sweetie-face baby. I'm so sorry for your loss.
DeleteAwwww what an adorable little nugget!!! I am so happy to hear that he had such a long and happy life with your family, and thank you for giving him a loving home. I hope that you can find some sense of peace during this heartbreaking time.
DeleteI'm not getting a link for the pictures. :(
DeleteSorry, my cut & paste didn't work well.
DeleteJJ 1
JJ 2
Sugarhugs to you Karen. I had 2 put 2 of my beloved down at the same time last year and I cried all day and it was very quiet at home with the other 2 but the other 2 were so sick and I'll they were cranky and lashing out on theothers so when they last 2 realized it was just them there was a bit of peace and calm in the house because the ones in pain had passed on.
DeleteNever easy though. . Sugar Hugs
I'm very sorry Karen *HUGS* pets know how much they are loved and I'm sure yours was no different.
DeleteSo very sorry Karen, it's a hard thing even when you know it's for the best.
DeleteLosing a furry kid is never easy, very sorry to hear about your loss Karen. Glad you have other dogs in the house, even though everyone is special and unique. Peace to you.
DeleteOh Karen, I have a min fox terrier and she is a darling.....I am so sorry sweetie. Losing pets is so heart breaking as you love each other unconditionally <3 to you
DeleteWhat a gorgeous boy. Thank you for sharing these Karen. I created a memory box of my girls and we put their picture as phone wall paper in tribute to them. It helps to ease the loss and pain.
DeleteCurrently debating how I should approach a situation with one of my best friends, because her boyfriend sucks!!! It's been building up but we go together like oil and water. Want to plan a vacation get together and I don't think I can go with him. I wouldn't be able to avoid him as much as I like, and I also I don't want my having to appease everyone to ruin MY week of vacation because I am annoyed and can't voice it.
ReplyDeleteThat is an awkward situation. How gaga is she about him? Would she risk losing your friendship?
DeleteIf it's your best friend, it's probably OK to just say the things as they are, with kindness and respect, so it's all out in the open. There is a way to say these things with respect and compassion. If you can find the right words, be apologetic to your friend, even if you feel you don't owe an apology, I think it is OK to just state how you feel and not to hold her responsible for your discomfort around this man.
DeleteYes, methinks Sophie is correct. Just say the two of you dont hit it off, no one's failt, kust 2 differemt personalities. And good luck and let us lnow what happens.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteJessi that just sucks. I feel for you. My HS friend started dating this guy I just hated and we stopped being friends purely because I just drifted away to avoid him. They were married for 15 yr before she finally wises up. Girl has an IQ of 145 but she couldn't figure out he was a loser (He apparently was unable to keep a job and she said he probably worked a total of 6 months in all that time.) I hope your friend wises up sooner.
ReplyDeleteI'm watching a Bizarre Foods marathon and enjoying my Pres Days holiday. A friend wants me to join her for potluck lunch and don't even want to leave the house. Sorry for those experiencing snow. The weather has been spring like in San Francisco.
Sherry, it's been bitterly cold in Ohio for several days and expected to remain frigid throughout the week.
DeleteI think Saturday it was something like -8 with a wind chill of -27. Crazy stuff. Oh, how I long to be sitting (or more like standing) in the Buena Vista Cafe with an Irish Coffee right about now.
Sorry to hear Karen. If you were here I would buy you that Irish Coffee and take a cable car to get there.
DeleteI went to a seminar for my Master's and it was very encouraging. Then I went for dinner at my friend's and had a nice girl chat. This degree was the best decision I ever made.
ReplyDeleteCongrats @Sophie Helene! Going to graduate school was the best decision I ever made. Soak in every minute until your ass gets kicked back out into the big scary real world out there! ;)
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteJessi I feel for you I do I had best friends when I moved to Vegas we spent all our time together. 1 got a shittyyy boyfriend who made her do horrible things to him in public gambled all the time with her money. Pocketed the winnings and just oops oh well if he lost. Gave her herpes Which she flat out denied to our face he gave her but it was all over her mouth. He insisted on Not using condoms. He openly cheated on her in the tiny casino that they worked at but she still stuck with him because she wanted a boyfriend and I guess he had her convinced she'll never do better. I took the soft line and tried to point out slyly all his bad doings but she brushed them off as me being jealous of her having a boyfriend and me being single. So I finally tried to put my foot down and pointedly say all the shittyyy things he does to her and she cut me out. We were bff for 2 years. Never heard from her again. She eventually dumped him when she ran out of her grandfather's trust fund that she was living off of but I never heard from her.
ReplyDeletemy other friend got a controlling bf Too and we drifted..
Moral is Jessi maybe just stand back and let this play this self out.. if you think he won't be around long. If she's completely crazy for this guy she'll choose him and not forget that you didn't support her.. maybe just give this guy just enough rope to hang himself. .anyway you can slyly gaslight him???
Just a thought
Been there done that. You can only say so much and then you have to leave it unless you find out something bordering on dangerous. I have also been proven wrong so you have to keep an open mind. But I had a friend who started dating a man whose ex accused him of physical abuse but she also heard the same rumours and he was otherwise douchey so I did gently bring it up, even the men in our group detested this guy and some of the other friends said something more bluntly than myself but she realized she made a mistake and broke up with him, it was a messy breakup but she apologized and appreciated that we had tried to warn her. She thought he had changed but he showed his true colours eventually. At least we tried.
DeleteUgh. Need advice. Been friends with a guy for over 10 years, we also have dated a few times over the years and remained friends through out. We always flirt/talk about hooking up and I started to get feelings for him - so I told him. He tells me he has a GF! How did he fail to mention this? So I tell him I need a break from our daily chats and that i'll contact him when I'm ready to talk - which I did today. It wasn't awkward until he starts sending me photos (just normal photos) of himself and I asked him to stop, and said that given our "misunderstanding" that for now, even though I love seeing his pictures, if he could refrain from doing so. Was I rude in asking this? We live on other sides of the country so we generally communicate through email/txt and he hasn't replied and he always replied right away.
ReplyDeleteMen are thicker that bricks sometimes. You're well within your rights to ask him to ease back until you get your equilibrium back.
DeleteGina he may be a feeling a little uncomfortable or just giving you some space.
DeleteHe's my age (early 30's) and this was his reply: "Fine, I can just disappear if you want". Is there ever a point where men actually grow up? SMH
DeleteGina, no, no there's not.
DeleteOMG I went through something similar some years ago. We had a flirtatious friendship for a while, and then he had a gf and did not tell me. Men are not girls, they don't know how to handle situations like this, so you have to be the bigger person and hide your disappointment and move on! Don't worry about him not replying, he will eventually. Just wait for a while, let your feelings die down, and when you are ready send a friendly email at the next birthday/Xmas/ Hannukah/grad/whatever. You just need to wait long enough to reboot the friendship. It's not as much a big deal as you feel right now: you are just upset and disappointed, and it's normal.
DeleteSorry for the second post but just wanted to add that men feel easily rejected. If you asked him not to send photos and told him you are upset he is not going to move towards you until he is invited. He is probably super confused and thinking he'd rather be quiet and avoid sending/saying something wrong to upset his friend (you) again. They generally don't like to make us unhappy.
DeleteSophie Helene I think you totally nailed it. Gina a second text explaining why it was difficult for you to see him, carefully worded may be able to get things back on track but let it rest for a few days to fully think it out. Good luck. Let us know how it turns out.
DeleteMaybe Jessi's friend's boyfriend is not a bad guy, maybe he's just an acquired taste. We can't like everyone right off the bat, and there's nothing wrong with someone who's perfectly fine for someone else not being your cup of tea. If we accept without explanation that sometimes we meet people we just "click" with, then we should also accept that sometimes we meet people that rub us the wrong way, for no definable reason. It just is. So if he's not a bad guy, just someone you'd rather not hang around with, then either see her without him (which probably means no joint vacations), or find a way to see him through her eyes enough to tolerate time with him. I know plenty of people who are socially awkward (like me), who don't always make good first/second/third impressions but are worth the effort. I also know people who are engaging and pleasant right away but eventually prove themselves to be shallow and destructive.
ReplyDeleteSo if it seems he's decent to her, but you just don't care for him, start a conversation about what it is that draws her to him (not asked in a skeptical way but in a curious way), and maybe you'll come around on him, enough for group activities anyway. If you don't like him because he treats her badly, then do your best to make your time with her a bf-free zone, so you aren't sucked into the drama and still have her as a friend when she reaches the conclusion you already reached.
Good luck.
Pray forme, i at American Girl dll store with 4 granddaughters!! And even tho they're mothers are with the - 2 mommies- it is pretty hectic!!! I am hiding out by the bathroom.
ReplyDeleteWe don't have those stores...is it mayhem?
DeleteIt is 2 floors of dolls and their accessories, with about 150 girls btwn 4to 12. U can also get the dolls hair done, ears pierced and go to doll hospital!!! Still hiding on bench, and i found some pretzels in my purse. They prob for kids, but screw them, lol
DeleteOh my! Lol that sounds like a panic attack to me disguised by doll and doll accessories! You eat those pretzels, you deserve them!
DeleteMade Moroccan chicken for lunch and am finishing up baking the rest of the peanut butter cookie dough we made last week. That worked out great. We made a huge batch of dough, made a couple dozen cookies and then foil wrapped the dough and stuck it in the fridge for later. Today after lunch IS later ;)
ReplyDeleteSupernatural marathon is on, but I'm gonna switch over to watch the latest installment of Black Sails and see what those hot pirates are up to.