And You Thought Lorena Bobbitt Was Bad!

The names are going to get confusing here, so I'll denote them with (M) for male and (F) for female. This story comes to you out of the People's Republic of China. Feng Lung (F), 30, found out that her husband Fan Lung (M), 32, was having an affair when Fan (M) borrowed Feng's (F) phone to sext his girlfriend. Fan (M) forgot to log out of his account, and when Feng (F) found the messages, the mother of five became enraged. She marched into their bedroom, and while her husband slept, she cut off his penis with a scissors. Sadly, Fan (M) made it to the hospital along with his penis, and they were able to reattach it. Of course, this would not do for Feng (F), because everybody knows that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Feng (F) proceeded to cut of Fan's (M) newly attached penis, and threw it out the hospital window. Fan (M), bleeding like a stuck pig, chased Feng (F) into the street and started hitting her. Authorities were unable to find his penis the second time. But don't worry about Fan (M); his mistress said she doesn't mind one bit that he no longer has a penis, because he already has five children. The moral of the story? Cheaters never prosper.