Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Scarlett Johansson Talks (Non) Monogamy

Scarlett Johansson recently sat down for an interview with Playboy (but she kept her clothes on for the pics). Here are some of the highlights:

Interviewer: Every once in a while someone will do you a great service by saying something revelatory to you, about you—and of course you’re like, “Fuck you, you don’t know me.” Then you go home and think about it and you’re like, Oh my God, they’re exactly right.
Scarlett: "I was listening to this TED Talk about relationships, and the person who was giving the talk was saying that in moments when you’re starting a new relationship and your friends and family say, “No, this is a red flag. This person is not for you”—why do we ignore those people who know us so well in the moments that we don’t? And then we distance ourselves from them because we’re embarrassed or whatever. It’s interesting how sometimes all you need is your good friend to tell you that you’re not acting like yourself. Or that they see something in front of you that is not beneficial for you or true to who you actually are. I don’t know. It’s so easy to just go, “No, I don’t want to hear that.”"

Well, love is so deeply intoxicating at first. You’re just out of your mind.
"Of course."

No one can tell you anything.
"And the part of your brain that functions then is a dysfunctional part—it’s not the rational side of your brain. It’s the addictive part of your brain that fires up when you have those first feelings of love, and it’s so good."

You’ve said that you aren’t sure humans are designed to be monogamous.
"Well, with every gain there’s a loss, right? So that’s a loss. You have to choose a path. I think the idea of marriage is very romantic; it’s a beautiful idea, and the practice of it can be a very beautiful thing. I don’t think it’s natural to be a monogamous person. I might be skewered for that, but I think it’s work. It’s a lot of work. And the fact that it is such work for so many people—for everyone—the fact of that proves that it is not a natural thing. It’s something I have a lot of respect for and have participated in, but I think it definitely goes against some instinct to look beyond."

And of course many marriages don’t work out.

"I think marriage initially involves a lot of people who have nothing to do with your relationship, because it’s a legally binding contract, and that has a weight to it. Being married is different than not being married, and anybody who tells you that it’s the same is lying. It changes things. I have friends who were together for 10 years and then decided to get married, and I’ll ask them on their wedding day or right after if it’s different, and it always is. It is. It’s a beautiful responsibility, but it’s a responsibility." 

You were married for the second time in 2014. Did you wake up the next morning and feel different?
"Yeah, definitely. It felt different. I had a really young baby at the time, so that also—our family dynamic was just different. I don’t know. Whatever that is, the thing you can’t fully put words to, it changed. "

And it felt different from your prior marriage too?

"Yeah, of course. I had a baby, and also my husband was coming from another country and becoming a citizen of this country. It was a huge transition for both of us, and certainly for him—moving here, committing to the States. But I think my husband has embraced America, and New York in particular, in this really endearing way. He was making meatballs the other night, actually. I wasn’t home. I was away, and he sent me a picture. He was like, “I’m a real New Yorker, and I love The Sopranos!” I was just, “You go, babe.”"

Read the full interview at Playboy.

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