Me reaching for the dried mango at Trader Joe’s after repeatedly saying “No, I’m fine!” when an employee asks if I need any help.— Eden Dranger (@Eden_Eats) February 17, 2020
pic.twitter.com/SNfsjxfXVy
My dad is in New Orleans for the first time and called me with a childlike sense of wonder I have never heard in his voice before. He said “this is a happy place”, “all of the food is good”, and “I saw a dog parade and there was a chihuahua in a wig, she was the princess”— ben mekler (@benmekler) February 17, 2020
when I got married in 1980 one of husbands old aunts took me aside and said “be a good wife and do sex on demand”— Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) February 17, 2020
Me “what if he can’t keep up with my demands do I take a lover?”
She never spoke to me EVER again
Dang it doesn’t anyone here know how to cook umber pic.twitter.com/biBCgPm1lR— non podhoretz (NOT the guy from commentary) (@crookedroads770) February 16, 2020
Made the bed, kept cleaning the apartment, realized I hadn’t seen the cat for a little bit and found him like this pic.twitter.com/ohB7CkmYcM— Dani Balenson (@dlbee_) February 16, 2020
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