Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Celebrity Real Estate - Bruno Mars' Tacky Valley Mansion

Bruno Mars just plunked down $6.5 million on a very tacky mansion in the Valley. The estate features seven bedrooms, eight bathrooms, and was previously owned and decorated by the daughter of a major player in Kazakhstan (I'm assuming it's not Borat). See pictures of the eclectic abode at Curbed.
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29 comments:

  1. JessiDecember 31, 2014 at 7:42 AM

    Oh good God. Well, um the view from the pool is nice.

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  2. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 7:45 AM

    So yeah....the pool is nice and blue.

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  3. mynervaDecember 31, 2014 at 7:45 AM

    Someone send him a can of petrol and a box of matches. That's hideous.

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  4. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 7:48 AM

    I couldn't sit and enjoy a meal in that dining room, it's waaaaay too busy. I'm sure he will redecorate though so it wont be so bad.

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  5. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 7:54 AM

    Never judge a home based on someone else's decorating choices. That being said, I trust the previous owners have moved all that hideous furniture out of there and Bruno has about $10,000 worth of Kilz budgeted.

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  6. Seven of ElevenDecember 31, 2014 at 7:56 AM

    What is wrong with you people? That place is gorgeous! Patsy and I would totally live there and lounge on the green couch in the kitchen or the yellow couch in the sunroom or prop our feet on the Union Jack in the entertainment room while our laundry tumbles in the glorious red washer/dryer set!

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    Replies
    1. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 8:02 AM

      One would need servants to peel the grapes before plopping them in one's mouth when reclining on the sofa.

      And what is with that tufted lime green sectional the size of Rhode Island?

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    2. Seven of ElevenDecember 31, 2014 at 8:40 AM

      I nominate Chris Hemsworth for grape peeling duties! :D

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    3. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 9:02 PM

      I kinda like it except for the red walls... and the green couch. Love the kitchen and the open concept. Of course the pool is gorgeous - just needs a cabana boy named Raoul.

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  7. GlitterDecember 31, 2014 at 8:01 AM

    That house is a decorating hot mess.

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  8. auntliddyDecember 31, 2014 at 8:36 AM

    Okay, coupla things. Whats with this wine cellar crap? I wld have as much use for that as a boil on my ass. I know its a status symbol but really. And why do kids need seperate wong? In case they get infectious disease? And family room with bar? Whattya mixing up mattinis for your 6 yr old?! And as amatuer decorator, some paint- well alot- and recover the furniture and ur good to go. Laundry room i dont mind, cos ur doing laundry, who cares what it looks like? And the religious looking themed rug in the one bathroom??!! Oh that has to stay, its a riot!! You cld hv fun in that house i think.

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  9. BallyDecember 31, 2014 at 8:58 AM

    I just lost 20% of the hearing in one ear, because of how loud the colors in that house are.

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  10. All Lace no LeatherDecember 31, 2014 at 8:58 AM

    Remove the wallpaper and repaint all those over colored walls, replace the furniture and it will be fine.

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  11. kelliknowsDecember 31, 2014 at 9:08 AM

    Those sofas would give me nightmares..do like the closet though.

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  12. B626December 31, 2014 at 9:13 AM

    I dont mind the furniture but the wallpaper is Gawdawful and the shit is not fun to tear down.

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  13. Rose LizenbergDecember 31, 2014 at 9:21 AM

    I um....like how the walls are vertical while the floors and ceilings are horizontal. Oh and that green couch - i like that too. Otherwise....no.

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  14. DivingirlDecember 31, 2014 at 9:34 AM

    The house has good bones. Hire a design/reno team and make it shine! I love these posts Outtie!

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  15. SherryDecember 31, 2014 at 10:23 AM

    There's nothing I can add to these comments that haven't already been said. My Oh my! Someone fancies themselves a decorator.

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  16. UnknownDecember 31, 2014 at 10:54 AM

    Exactly you can't judge the house on the basis of the previous owners - I watch Millionaire Listings of Los Angeles, I have seen people buy multi million dollar houses with full intentions of gutting the whole house, even demolishing it, even houses that I think already look great - and starting afresh - they want the land and the view and prime land can cost that much and this guy got loads he is super talented. His songs get stuck in my head.

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  17. SugarTitzDecember 31, 2014 at 11:53 AM

    um you guys are crazy.. 2 acres on a double gated entry
    2 saunas wet/dry 9000 sq ft??
    get a few designers out of design school and it will cost very little to make it faboo
    possibilities are endless

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  18. AnonymousDecember 31, 2014 at 1:13 PM

    I just loooooooove Bruno Mars!!!

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  19. get off my lawnDecember 31, 2014 at 2:32 PM

    I also love Bruno Mars, but, alas, I think the poor boy in color blind!

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  20. get off my lawnDecember 31, 2014 at 3:51 PM

    Is not in!!! Sheesh. Not even drinking yet!

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  21. MinPinGirlDecember 31, 2014 at 8:55 PM

    The green couch and the Union Jack ottoman are awesome! The rest mostly just needs paint.

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  22. MinPinGirlDecember 31, 2014 at 8:57 PM

    Of course with his $$ I'd be remodeling that kitchen for sure.

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  23. AoifeJanuary 1, 2015 at 6:51 AM

    That green monstrosity.

    HGTV should send in one of their top decorators and make a series of redoing that hot mess of a house. Of course the decorator would need paramedics with him/her to revive them after they go into a dead faint.

    Bring Sarah and Tommy in? Genevieve?

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