So Outtie started this Anarchy post and it seems like a good place to stick the Foxella reveals so they don’t clog the comments on the Instagram post. I love Outtie. (And I am not Outtie.)
As my belated Christmas gift to you and Outtie, I’m subjecting myself to that other place and posting the reveals (and only the reveals, the BIs come from Foxella). Now in case you’re reading this, Kim Jong Enty, once again – I am NOT Outtie and I am copy/pasting this with attribution to your site and with commentary in line with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that material may be quoted as long as it is substantially changed in line with the purpose of the quote – in this case, a whole lotta snark. ‘Kay, boo?
This first one is a batch because they're kind of boring and obvious.
Blind Items Revealed (BIR) #5 – Mr Zzzzzzzzz
You always know Mr X blinds are going to be like knock knock jokes. Orange you glad you’re not a banana? What does that even mean? Of course I’m glad I’m not a banana but if I was a banana, how would I know to not be glad I wasn’t an orange? Wouldn’t that imply bananas have brains? If that’s the case, vegetarians are going to have a really bad new year.
So anyway, today’s BIR from the Mattress King comes via the K-Klan.
September 29, 2014 What B-list actress, model and celebrity spawn was overheard saying to one of her friends “Who the hell did she f**k to get that job?” She being that B-list reality star sibling. Riley Keough/Kendall Jenner
I was going to make these separate but I’m fresh out of Breathe Right strips to give to Mr X, so let’s just condense them. BIR#4 is about Mimi’s ex who I didn’t know was an actor (wasn’t he a reality star or something day before yesterday?) and that guy who saw The Wiz in grade school and thought it was a good stage name. And you know what? I’m still bitter because in the original, we thought Mr X had gone to the great mattress in the sky. Hmph.
September 29, 2014 In an irony of ironies, which B-list mostly television actor/host sold some drugs to that B-list rapper whom he now has made enemies with? Nick Cannon/Wiz Khalifa
BIR #3 with Mr Who - I still don’t know who this is or why they stage publicity stunts, but the misspellings of their name in the original (Insanity Cane!) was amusing.
August 8, 2014 Which girl group/reality stars are hoping to get another reality show by staging some wacky publicity stunts? Nobody will probably pay attention, though. Danity Kane
A Kardashian reveal? 2014 was a slow gossip year for KJE...
** NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must do so with the purpose of substantial change, such as commentary. SevenofEleven, the commenter who still is not Outtie, retains no rights to the original work and offers all attribution to the pretend bacon lawyer/owner of the web site crazy days and nights dot net, and retains all rights to the snark.
So our first non-Mr X BIR does not bode well because it ends with “last one of her for today”. Crap, that means there are multiples for her. One assumes it will be someone who filed for divorce or got engaged or got married or had sinus surgery recently. One would be right if they guessed divorce, KimmiJong* adores a juicy divorce story.
September 7, 2014 This married A list female celebrity chef was offered a spot on RH-NY. At this point she has not said no, but I can’t imagine her saying yes. She doesn’t want her baggage aired in public. Giada (last one of her for today)
And in the spirit of condensation (heh), I’m going to condense all Giada BIRs into this one comment thread just because you don’t have to click on multiple headlines to get the answer or read the comments and BONUS, I won’t threaten you if you don’t read it exactly the way I want you to. I mean, you can read it in your email (because Blogger lets you follow conversations) or you can read it on your phone (because AG is mobile friendly) or you can read it on your macbook in front of the Netflix fireplace (I guess….). Toast to Outtie (who is still not me)!
*name changed because I got new socks for Christmas
NOTE: item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must have some redeemable value other than its original purpose and I think snark is a redeeming value. SevenofEleven who is still not Outtie gives full attribution for these words to the person who tweeted a really tasteless joke last year and runs a website called crazy days and nights, which - according to its disclaimer - is a site of conjecture, rumor, and fiction.
From this reveal, I take it that the Supreme Commander of the People’s Republic of AdsLand* doesn’t really like Marilyn Manson’s ex.
August 15, 2014 This former A- list mostly television actress who had one hit show on an almost network and now seems to wander from project to project while making sure she gets her photo taken by paps several times a week was confronted by actual fans earlier this week but our actress refused to sign any photos that included photos of any of her co-stars from that popular show. Considering how hammered she was you probably couldn’t make out her scrawl anyway. Rose McGowan
*name changed because mimosa time, baby!
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must do so with the purpose of substantial change, such as commentary. SevenofEleven, the commenter who still is not Outtie, retains no rights to the original work and offers all attribution to the pretend bacon lawyer/owner of the site that goes by crazy days and nights dot net, and retains all rights to the snark.
This one is kind of dumb because Oatmeal Schilling (the main character on Orange is the New Black) openly dated Carrie Brownstein. There are even photos of them – in Kim Young Enty’s* words, “canoodling” – at parties.
Fun factoid, though: Carrie’s co-star on Portlandia, Fred Armisen, ex-husband of Mad Men star Elisabeth Moss (who famously said that her marriage to Fred was “traumatic and awful and horrible”) was Natasha Lyonne’s (Nicky Nichols on OITNB) date for all of the Emmy parties this year!
August 9, 2014 This B+ list kind of television actress is not allowed to date anyone. No one. Her handlers want her ready for the right kind of publicity match. Meanwhile she wanders around parties and events with no one but a publicist. Taylor Schilling
*name changed because I had an orange at breakfast (Mimi told me it counts if the orange is squeezed into a flute and topped with bubbly, only 4 servings of fruit left to go in the day!)
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine and without Outtie's prior knowledge and with a lot of snark because my cat just bit my leg. Original words in italics are directly attributed to the gossip website crazydaysandnights.net, the other stuff can be used to answer Jeopardy! questions.
I feel like these reality ones should get a comment section of their own because I’m always scratching my head and thinking, “Who?”
With this one, I’m adding “cares?” to that question.
August 9, 2014 Apparently this future Bachelor is a little wanting in the endowment department according to a recent bedroom partner. Chris Soules
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine, which states that reprinting is allowed as long as the value of the reprinted item is not the same as the item itself, which it obviously isn't because the two-liner attached to it is worth at least half a taco more, and is attributed to the source, which it is, it's that website crazy days and nights dot net.
Since I am not a tweener and not closely related to any tween girl, I don’t really know anything about this guy, except for one interesting tidbit: yesterday, Outtie posted that Christine Cavanaugh passed away (RIP!). Christine played Mrs Remo, the wife of the injured hockey player that Jerry Maguire represents in the movie Jerry Maguire (duh). Anyway, remember Steve Remo’s son Jesse – the one who told Jerry this was his dad’s fourth concussion and then told Jerry to f* off when Jerry tried to play it off like Dad was fine, it was all good? That was Drake Bell. According to KJE, Drake tries to make himself known via controversy, it doesn't work, so he makes himself seen in public a lot and uses that to pick up women. (I'm trying to figure out how he'd pick up women if he wasn't seen in public... OKCupid?)
One of those 4 for Friday BIs says that Evan Rachel Wood cheated on Ellen Page by sleeping with a (GASP!) guy to get a role in a Marvel movie. OK.
I wish I could believe this but Kumquat’s* Kindness BIs are just so far out in left field, they’re barely believable. Their own personal Jesus didn’t send his former castmate Angela Chase flowers or a card, no, he sent a congrats note (a year after the baby was born) AND he donated $50,000 work of diapers and formula to local charities. Right.
I remember this one because I thought for sure that a gossip blogger would know the definition of a roman a clef (a fictionalized version of real events, ala Valley of the Dolls or any Jackie Collins book). Apparently Jamie Cheesesteak Kennedy, who dated Jennifer Love Hewitt for a year, is trying to get around a confidentiality agreement by writing a book about their relationship. Blogger thinks it will be really good. I think a ghost whispered that to them.
In better news, a roman a clef about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes was published – and the author hasn’t gone missing yet!
I'd love to see JLH join the cast of Mistresses ... now that hideous Alyssa Milano has gone, a vacancy has been created ... and as JLH's husband is also on the show (Brian Hallisay), they could both make the trip to film the show on the new set in Canada.
Nic Cage is one of those actors who is just eccentric enough that you can slap a BI on them at any time. Just ‘Kuz Enty* once said that Nic shares his girlfriend with his son or something like that, and that he owes a bunch of money to some shady people. So this week’s BIR slap on ol’ Nic is that he is hair challenged, wears a cowboy hat to a truck stop to meet a hooker, sometimes puts on a fake mustache, and “thinks people can’t recognize him” because JKE ALWAYS knows what the celebs are thinking.
*name changed because I just remembered there’s no garbage delivery today
I am enjoying these reveals as well as listening to Terry Gross's interview of Neil Patrick Harris. He's talking about his outting by Perez Hilton among other things. He's such a wonderful guy and talks about how he felt it to be disrespectful to his husband David to hide his relationship. That's such a beautiful thing.
neil begged E! to give david a job b/c he was sick of him just laying around the house spending his money.. apparently people on set of himym were constantly referring to david as his boy toy and such
Even Enternational Supahstahs* have to phone it in sometimes. In this BIR, Kate Moss kneed Marky Mark in his man bits because he tried to grope her in the trailer. Except… Kate Moss gave an interview in Vanity Fair that she was a nervous wreck during the shoot, was freaked out by her body because she was flat-chested, didn’t want to straddle the “buff” Mark, and had panic attacks. That does not sound like Barb Wire, that sounds like a 17 year old girl freaking out over being photographed nude. Nice try, ES.
Now this one I know for a FACT is bs of the highest order. The Supreme Leader of the Putrid Creamsicle Color Theme* says that Angelina Jolie got a tropical disease and lost a bunch of weight and they thought it was Ebola. They hate Angelina Jolie the way I hate onions – remember when they said that Billy Bob Thornton was the first one to see Angie’s new boobs? I feel like Dr Cox saying, “You go there, champ. And go quickly.”
We were all expecting this one. Via Foxella, Sparkles Pattinson is being gaslighted by his girlfriend FKA Twigs. KStew tried to intervene but she had to go work on her truck or something.
Friends of the actor are convinced he is going to wake up in a few months and realize he has no money left January 1, 2015 This actor is probably A-/B+. He was A+ at one point but it was strictly franchise related. He has not made the most of his opportunities post franchise. He is foreign born. He is also being played for a fool by his new girlfriend. She has somehow convinced the actor to buy a new home and put her on the title even though she won’t be contributing any money to the place. Friends of the actor are worried because she has been cutting him off from those close to him and he has radically changed from a booze and bar kind of guy to a hard drug and night club kind of guy who has his girlfriend glued to his side at all times. He does everything she tells him from what to wear or not to wear and how he should look each day. His ex, who is also an actress has tried to intervene but she is going through issues of her own and some very very big decisions she needs to make in the near future. Friends of the actor are convinced he is going to wake up in a few months and realize he has no money left and a wife who will slowly kill him off. Actor: Robert Pattinson Girlfriend: FKA twigs Ex: Kristen Stewart
*NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that does not sparkle in the dark
I don’t know what “dirty enough” means but since this is the Pearl Clutcher On Duty*, I’m going to guess it means taking her shirt off with (GASP!) the lights on!!!!
Apparently she was not dirty enough for him because after the deed she got out and he left January 1, 2015 Nothing like being cheated on right before the holidays.
This former A list tweener who loves that her show was canceled so she can be the solo star she has always wanted to be was cheated on by her B list celebrity/performer boyfriend who had sex with a woman he met at a party in the car he was provided. Driver waited outside.
The celebrity/performer says he never lets hookups go back to his place or hotel until they get dirty for him.
Apparently she was not dirty enough for him because after the deed she got out and he left.
Ariana Grande Big Sean
*name changed because my co-worker has a mini-figurine of Gerard Butler on his desk and those are some impressive abs
NOTE: item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that’s just dirty enough for ya
One of the Jonas brothers didn’t hit on a girl. It’s the stuff that tween nightmares are made of.
He said that he prefers men to women but did hang out with her all night
January 1, 2015
This probable one hit wonder with one of the most memorable songs of 2014 says that she got a key to the hotel room of this former A list tweener who is having a decent year and was waiting in his bed naked and he said that he prefers men to women but did hang out with her all night.
Just never made any kind of move.
Meghan Trainor Nick Jonas
*name change not needed because I never pop my own champagne. I’m afraid I’ll shoot my eye out.
NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip blog aggregator that will not make any kind of move on you
I think the entire blind is sort of BS. The tax break analogy is incorrect. Destroying or giving away - no difference. They did not give the clothes away to a charity because they did not want poor people buying it Goodwill or whatever. Or 3rd world folks walking around wearing it. That would be the end of the clothing brand.
Also, it's a really shitty thing to do to people who are already disadvantaged. Broke? Can't afford food, let alone new clothes? Here, we're going to make your misery complete by giving you these asstwat's clothes!
Remember when National Lampoon’s Entward Vacation* stole that Page 6 line about two bigwigs sitting by each other and made it an epic battle for the ages between powerhouses BI? This time they swiped from MichaelK to make up a BI. Here’s MichaelK’s piece:
This A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee stole film footage shot by his assistant (for a film his assistant is making) and is now claiming it’s his original work for his upcoming film….
James Franco
*name changed because I couldn’t find my pen and realized only late into the morning that I’d stuck in my hair
*NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine that indicates items can be reprinted partially or in their entirety as long as the purpose of reprinting said item has changed. Since my purpose is not to profit from making things up based on other people’s work, I retain no rights to the original words that come from a site that says it publishes “rumors, conjecture, and fiction”.
Supposedly Charming Potato gave Ricky Martin a good time in exchange for two seconds in a video. And then he bragged about it. Remember when Original Recipe Enty* bragged about being friends with Britney Spears?
Singer was bragging to a couple of his friends about the time now A+ list actor gave him good head
December 31, 2014
Which foreign born, openly gay singer was bragging to a couple of his friends about the time that now A+ list actor gave him good head to get a job as a dancer in one of his music videos?
Ricky Martin Channing Tatum She Bangs video – he is in it for couple seconds
*name changed because now I want chicken
NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip website that does not provide oral services
Channing would have been 19 when that video was filmed. Channing might even have been 18. Channing would be the type of guy my ex girlfriend would go for. Channing is a tool. I hate Channing.
I tried too, but it was no bueno. Thanks Seven for your recapping and Happy New Year everyone!! Side note: Not sure if this was already mentioned in a different note, but I was a little (not a lot) surprised to see certain folks posting on CDAN who quit posting there long ago. I know it's reveal day, but I thought that they were done with that site for good.
OK, right now it's up to about 20. A reality couple from Jersey Shore named Ronnie and Sammi broke up because he cheated with her bestie. I'm guessing Ronnie is the guy or the names would be Ronni and Sammie, right? I'm guessing you were all on the edge of your seats waiting for that one, right?!
Guess which celeb has Alzheimer's and had a tribute for her canceled because she was too ill to attend? Mary Tyler Moore. I'm going to dip my toes in the sarcasm pool and comment on how terribly awesome it is to make a blind item out of Alzheimer's. Fun times!
I wonder if KJE will reveal who the actor is, who's suffering from Parkinson's (or was it Alzheimers?) ... someone who's working and struggling to keep up ... many guessed Tom Selleck
I posted this on another thread also, but I was curious what the attendance/comments numbers looked like on CDAN today, if anyone is over there. About how many reader photos did they end up with?
brenda - like Seven said the blind reveals are up to 20 and one post of reader pics (35). Not sure if views are accurate but around 2000 per item and the comments are around what they have been lately- 5-15. Not sure if the postings have stopped or not.
fyi - other than one annoying pop up that has audio I don't have a problem accessing site. Not crazy about layout ect but, at least, technically it works from my laptop.
I popped in the other day and saw a mixed celeb and readers' photos post in the random photos ... I swear a couple of the readers' pics were from last year
So has anyone determined what is actually legal to post? Like could I say that I took a mimosa fueled nap just now and had a dream that Shia LaBeouf sleeps fully attired including his combat footwear and is celibate? Or maybe I could tell you about the dream I had about Brit Brit where she was seated on her lonesome eating fro yo while a bunch of buff protectors pretended she was not there? Hmmm
Ah, this one I have to reprint because a) it's just craziness and everyone knows Shia does this because he doesn't know how to change clothes and b) I really am the wholesome one!
August 20, 2014
Just when you thought this hanging on to A list mostly movie actor couldn’t get more strange, he does. His actress girlfriend tells friends that the couple never has sex any longer because the actor never takes his clothes off. Ever. He sleeps in his clothes and footwear and above the covers. He says it is so he can be ready.
Shia LaBeouf/Mia Goth
NOTE: reprinted via the Fair Use Doctrine, which says that wholesome snarkers like 7of11 (not to be confused with the convenience store or the borg lady, both ™ someone else) can reprint it as long as they give attribution (hi, crazydaysandnightsdotnet) and substantially change the purpose of the printing (in this case, for hangover standup filler).
And how disgusting is it to sleep in your shoes?! You don't know what you possibly stepped in and have growing on the bottom of your sneakers...then you go bring that shit into bed with you?
You know what I was wondering? If I was an actress, say someone young like Anna Kendrick, and I was on the nookie hook for some actor, who would that actor be? It have to be someone I'd drop everything for since I'm jumping at his "back and call" [sic]. Hmmm
So, a singer ate by herself with 5 bodyguards who looked away from her and she didn't even have a phone or Star magazine to read while she was eating. She just stared vacantly at the bodyguards' backs (maybe she was reading their tattoos?) with a sad, vacant look in her eyes and never spoke a word to anyone, servers or fans. I feel like this is a Helen Keller thing where she carries a notepad around and writes "Cheeto Taco" on it since she's so drugged down she apparently can't even read. Once again, let us pay homage to Original Recipe Enty*, who said they would never said a negative thing about Britney Spears.
*name changed because Brit looks great and makes way more money without having to issue cease and desist orders for vaguely unoriginal content
Hey, you're back! OK, here's a good one: my favorite fellow resting b* face girl Anna Kendrick is caught in the sticky web of gossipy stuff that might be as authentic as a Kardashian charity drive. She's sleeping with a guy behind her boyfriend's back or something like that. Whatever, this needs a cheering up song!
I’ve got my ticket and I’m Anarchy bound Cooler of mimosa for the way And I sure would like some sweet company And I’m glad you came – what do you say?
When I’m gone, when I’m gone Oh, they’re gonna miss me when I’m gone They’re gonna miss us by our hair They’re gonna miss our snark everywhere, oh They’re gonna miss since we’re gone.
Cashed your ticket for the long way ‘round The site with the way better views It’s got snark, it’s got news It’s got original news And it sure is prettier with you!
Since we’re gone, since we’re gone Found a new place to call home Don’t miss autoplays that scare Don’t miss the ads everywhere I don’t miss the place that’s gone.
OK, next one down: Jack Nicholson partied with his son and they shared four women. Ew. Also, it was cribbed from the DM so not really a BI or a reveal.
Then there are the reader photos, 35 of them.
Then the math-challenged Entern steps in. Dina Lohan walked away with three bottles of expensive champagne and broke a fourth on the way out.
Diane Keaton publicly supports Woody Allen but privately won't let him near her kids. I had to open a new browser window because the way the site loads, it gets stuck at page 2 or some crap (seriously, there about 36 scripts on that page) and in the new browser, I don't have AdBlock installed yet. The autoplay ad is for a workout video that asks "what do you do when you have a massive hangover?" and then starts showing you a bunch of yoga moves. BULL. Hair of the dog, baby, hair of the dog.
This next one involves someone I have loved since I was a kid. Pastor KJE* says that Meg Ryan has completely lost her marbles since her show wasn't picked up and her film project isn't doing too well, so she goes to confession 4-5 times in different NYC churches.
Here's what I'm trying to figure out: how does RevE know this? Is there a pap following her into every confession booth? Is he on the Roman Catholic Confessional email list? Is he posing as Eric Camden to get into the confessional booth? (Did Rev Camden wear a collar? I don't remember...)
I think this might be it! Rosie O'Donnell wants to be top dog again on the View. Everyone is so shocked they immediately renounce all of their resolutions.
Some more Foxella items coming up but I'm just glad I don't have to see that red curtain anymore.
Whelp, I thought it was over because it's almost 4PM PST, but nope.
Just because I love the Marshall and Lily gif, I'm planting it here. So anyway, this one has to be reprinted because it doesn't make a whole lot of sense and Elizabeth Berkley speaks another language?
Fun fact: Jessie Spano's right eye is half-green and half-brown. This is called heterochromia (clutch your pearls, Grandma E*!).
August 21, 2014
This former tween actress who never quite recovered from her first movie role was at the airport the other day with her young child. A woman who barely spoke English was asking people how to get to a certain terminal. Most people were ignoring her or giving her answers she didn’t understand. The woman started crying and our actress stepped in and even though she was carrying her child, our actress walked the woman to the terminal which took about twenty minutes and then walked all the way back to her own terminal.
Elizabeth Berkley
*name changed because don't it make my brown eyes blue...
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine that allows for reprinting of items as long as the reprinting serves a use other than the reprinting, like not making money and actually being amusing. Full attribution to crazy days and nights dot net for the words in italics, the rest belongs to the borg lady's younger sister.
Sheesh, it's #22 now. Parker Posey cries because she can't get work repping products.
Tori Spelling - who, as auntliddy points out, has Crohn's - is taking someone's product to stay skinny and KJE smells a lawsuit. I wonder if it smells like Bacon Frito farts. OH - and Tori's A list reality now.
I'm just reprinting this one because I don't get it. Who has the unusual name? "Tyga" or "Blac Chyna"? Did these people never have spelling tests in grade school?
August 21, 2014
I can’t wait until the day this C+ list celebrity with the very unusual name finds out her A list reality star “best friend” slept with the boyfriend of the C+ lister a couple of years ago while she was deciding who her next victim was going to be. So, yes, she stabbed her friend in the back and it is going to come out.
Blac Chyna/Kim Kardashian/Tyga
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is not only legal but also enjoyable.
NO ONE got this and guess why? Because it doesn't even make sense.
August 22, 2014
Look for this former A list reality star from multiple reality shows on multiple networks and cable channels to give the network whatever they want for her new show because she has already committed the money she thought was a sure thing for another season to another business she runs.
Nicole Richie
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is not only legal but also like a pot brownie in Colorado.
I thought her clothing line was moderately successful, and her husband has a regular gig on The Voice Australia. So why are they selling their Hollywood Hills house? They seem to be in a bit of a financial pickle. (They could be looking to upsize, but considering what I just said and the content of this Blind ...) ...
Have you seen the prices on some of her jewelry? I wouldn't pay that much (for what you're getting). I'd say she's put a lot more $$ into the line than she's getting back, and what sugar bread said about drugs & lifestyle etc.
I guess it's pick on Britney day. Earlier she wasn't allowed to read and eat, now she's being forced to perform. I would like to take this moment to once again (I know, third time today!) remind everyone that Original Flavor E* really liked Brit.
August 22, 2014
This A+ list “singer” had to be convinced/threatened to go back on stage during a change in clothes the other night. The singer spent five minutes arguing and crying before reluctantly going back out.
Britney Spears
*name changed because black eyed peas!
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which basically says smart alecks like 7of11 can reprint them as long as the reprint is for a use such as criticism (snap!), commentary (snap snap!), and/or reporting (THREE SNAPS UP!). Being the stand-up gal and borger princess that she is, this commenter wants everyone to know the words in italics are attributed to the site crazy days and nights dot net. Y'all come back now, ya hear?
#27: Basement Baby and Elevator Terrorist Solange Knowles got drunk on the red carpet and was asked to leave.
And there was a tweet that there's ten more hours to go. I'm going to start a Kickstarter campaign to fund a mimosa making machine that will hand deliver them to me (and do the laundry).
Get this - Billy Bob Thornton and Jon Voight were at the same OITNB party and the only blind they could make of it was that Billy Bob is stalking Laura Prepon. I would've thought there be something like how Jon Voight flipped his wig when he saw BBT and yelled at him about Angie's new boobs or how dare he crush Jon's precious daughter's feelings or maybe ask him she was in bed because you know who's mind totally goes that way. But nope, stalking a $cio outside of the bathroom.
August 25, 2014
At a party this weekend this OITNB star who was on a long running show a few years ago spent all night dodging the advances of this B list mostly movie actor who has been flirting with television the past year. The actor, who used to be with an A+ list mostly movie actress would not leave the OITNB actress alone and at one point parked himself in front of the women’s restroom to wait for her.
Laura Prepon/Billy Bob Thornton/Angelina Jolie
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is like waking up next to Chris Hemsworth with a mimosa in Tahiti.
The dancer guy who was Carrie's boyfriend on SatC (Mikhail Baryshnikov) had sex with Jessica Lange 20 minutes after meeting her and for the first year, they only had sex in the car. I hope the seats were heated.
#30 - KINDNESS: Stifler's mom was a little drunk and took pity on three female autograph seekers and told the security guards at the party they were the network head's nieces. The security guard couldn't stop staring at her cleavage (not really) and let them all in (that did happen). Stifler's mom is nice.
I think when Jessica and Mikhail were doing it in the car, half of New York was doing it in the booths upstairs at Studio 54 (to put things in perspective).
HOLY CRAP, they're still not done! I know this is not a one-person show because seriously, I just stepped away to put the black eyed peas on (the food, not the music, though I do like Fergie and her husband) and make some rice and they came up with six more reveals. Since the bep has another half hour or so and alas, no mimosa machine or Chris Hemsworth (the only acceptable substitute) appeared at my door, here goes.
Remember Josh Lucas from Sweet Home Alabama? I don't either, I barely remember that movie, but he was my boxed wine bestie's (Reese, of course) husband that had she had to divorce to marry McDreamy. McCeaseNDesisty* says that Josh is still really good looking (yeah, guys say that all. the. time.) and was apparently sipping from well drinks because he drunkenly tried to convince his date that he was making out with another woman on friendly terms. I wonder if he yelled, "I'm an 'Merican citi-shen! I can make out with whomever ah want to!"
*named changed because I'm an American and can change names when I want to! with love, Laura Jean Poon's best friend
Do you think it's OK to take ibuprofen with champagne? Because I think I gave myself a Lucille Bluth-worthy eyeroll migraine at this one. This one also convinced me that at least one member of the new E-Crew* is the parent of a tweener. Here's basically how it went:
Katniss Everdeen: "I'm finally A+ list!" Nick Hoult: "I'm only B+, damn it! I will have to figure out how to up my ratings on The Spreadsheet™!" Bella: "I can help! Let me finish fixing my truck and coming on to my director and grumbling!" Nick Hoult: "Jennifer, I know you're a superstar and an Oscar winner but the girl from Twilight is irresistable and I must have her. I hope that's OK." Jennifer Lawrence: "Yeah, right." Nick Hoult: "I can't wait!" Peeta: "Give her some bread, she can't resist bread!" Nick & Jennifer & KStew: "Shut up, Peeta!" KJE: "Ha, I knew it!" Gale: "They just want a good show. That's all they want. The odds were never in my favor. Ask Miley."
August 28, 2014
This couple had cheating issues on both sides. When the two briefly got back together they agreed to break up if either was going to cheat. The A+ list mostly movie actress was really surprised though when her B+ list mostly movie actor boyfriend came to her just a month after they had been dating again and said that he was going to inevitably have sex with this A- list mostly movie actress when they started filming together and so they should break up so he could start having sex with her right then instead of waiting. Apparently the A+ lister was crushed.
Jennifer Lawrence/Nicholas Hoult/Kristen Stewart
*name changed because EFFIE TRINKET!
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are like fake eyelashes, they just enhance what's already there while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net).
Next up is a Kindness and guess who nailed the original out of the gate? That's right, yours truly who rarely gets one! Hold on, gotta refresh the celebratory mimosa! :D
OK, it's really long and I won't bore you but basically Sandra Bullock bought two school busses for her kids' school and then a week later gave her dinner reservations to a soldier and his wife and posed for photos with them. KJE has thrown shade at SandyB before because she was married to that aryan toad but they couldn't this time. Celebrate good times, come on!
(Also, I will confess that I still love While You Were Sleeping.)
#34: Whitney Houston's daughter is "the biggest celebrity crack user" King Pipe E* has ever heard of (not Tiger Blood Sheen?) and "basically smokes crack 24/7" then sleeps it off and starts it up again. No word on dookie bubbles.
#35: Opie's Jon Snow has a fashion designer boyfriend who called her fat. She's really private, though. And Grandmaster Penty* has hinted before she may be more into ladies so who knows from which orifice this erupted.
#35: Michael Bay hires foreign college students to be his "au pairs" and by "au pair" he means "au pair of my testes in your hand" or something like that. Nanny McE* better hope Michael Bay doesn't see this on their site and flip his notorious lid and send out a great big ol' Cease 'N Desist with a side of NOW. :D
If Bobbie Christina smokes crack 24/7, how can she sleep it off? Unless there's some sort of nocturnal crack infusion device, that's possible, especially in Tinsel Town.
i saw side by side photos of chastain and ron howard's daughter and they looked exactly alike.. same nose , face shape, everything..hmmmm jessica snow indeed..
#37, I remember this one, they pulled it from Autograph magazine basically saying Will Ferrell is a douche who is mean to his fans. Will Ferrell teases his fans sometimes to see how far they'll go to get an autograph. As a guy who specializes in pushing boundaries for the sake of comedy (and I'm sorry, but I hated Anchorman 2), I could totally see him doing that and in fun, not being a Piven.
#38: Following up Mr Meanie No Autographs For You is Ms I Go On Vacation with My Fans and leave voicemails for them Reese Witherspoon. Yeah, I don't buy it, either. The last line is "people truly love her" and you just know in your heart of hearts that's got some temp workers seething.
#39: Another Nick somebody is cheating on Iggy Plant Lady, who this time doesn't know about it.
Oh for goodness sake, that old story gets hashed, and rehashed. Nick is not cheating on Iggy.
Fun fact: Iggy got her name by - her childhood pet (dog) named Iggy; Izalea is the street she grew up on in Mirumbumbee (sp?), a hippy sort of town by Byron Bay (Australia)
#41, This former soft-core porn actress (who would switch off interviewers tape recorders when asked about a certain A+ list actor/writer/director she was dating) never broke up with said A/W/D when he cheated on her with a now unrecognizable A list award winning actress. She did break up with him when he slept with a popular TV/movie actress (who famously had words with a legendary comedic actor everyone loves) and is now co-starring on a hit(ish) CBS series with a man who was once married to this very A++ actress-now-director.
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. One can also read these items in the backwards talking voice of the dancing dwarf from Twin Peaks (which was a TV series before crazy days and nights dot net was a thing.)
One of the commentators complained about "the gross toe nail fungus ad" that can't be avoided. Fair use doctrine stipulates that toe nail fungus ad should be soaked it in bacon grease.
Krista Allen - long suffering soft-core porn actress George Clooney - A+ list actor Renee Zellweger - unrecognizable A list award winning actress Lucy Liu - popular TV/movie actress
OT: More of a public service announcement really...let's all learn from my mistake about 10 mins ago and NEVER try riding your spin bike in the dark...take it from me people!!
Many years later I'm finally able to chuckle about the last time I said 'what does this button do' when operating a pressure cooker for the first time.
#42, This ginger-haired foreign born singer paid a compliment to this asshole-singer's girlfriend (not sure why she would warrant any compliments, but whatever, this obviously is a very nice guy) and asshole said the guy could take her out if so inclined. Nice guy singer said "Nah, I'm good" and then asshole-singer got all asshole-y and wanted to start a thing. Nice guy couldn't believe what was happening.
Oh, yeah - NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Also for use on sites that don't advertise toe fungus remedies (crazy days and nights dot net).
#40 - I'm trying to figure out this one works. The way it reads, Kim Basinger - who, according to YogaEnt is famous for one role and for being Hilaria Baldwin's husband's ex-wife - was way too demanding for an indie flick and wanted three cakes a day, so the indie producers got two Oscar noms/winners for the roles instead. Was Catwoman supposed to play both roles? And 9.5 weeks was not her only big role, she was in Batman and LA Confidential, both fairly substantial. BTW, the flick was "At Middleton" and Roger Ebert gave it 2 stars with this line that shows that Entern Spielberg is not quite up to snuff on what a smart script looks like.
""At Middleton" is the just the sort of trite if inoffensive diversion that barely tiptoes into theaters before landing in the cable and video-on-demand listings. And Garcia and Farmiga, as good as they can be in the right roles, aren't doing themselves or their careers any favors with this sort of C-level effort."
The Bored Item here:
September 7, 2014
This former A list mostly movie actress who kind of fell off the planet when she and the A list mostly television actor got divorced more than a decade ago has had her chances to work. Really famous for one iconic movie, the actress recently got a chance to star in an independent movie with a small budget and a great script. The budget was tiny but our actress wanted two separate trailers and cakes, yes cakes, delivered three times a day each day of shooting and had specific dimensions and flavors for each cake. Yeah, the producers passed and ended up landing two Academy Award winners/nominees for the lead roles.
Kim Basinger/Vera Farmiga/Andy Garcia
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Did you know there was a guy named Stanley Milgram who conducted experiments to study the difference between obedience to authority and obedience to personal conscience? Anarchy Research 101 thanks to tentodsthgindnasyadyzarc!
Thank you 7! And Jason, too. This was far more enjoyable than years-past and I was spared from going over to the POS site or choosing to skip it altogether. On a side note - wasn't it Michael K who tweeted his disgust at GrinchyEnty as he unfollowed him? Oh and another Thanks to Outtie for providing the space & everything
#43 looks to be the last one of the day. I finished the Brut and tomorrow is a new day!
So in this one, they're actually naming the abuser rather than the abused, and saying Errol Flynn, aka Zorro, aka dead guy who can't defend himself, had a thing for underage females.
September 24, 2014
If this actor was alive today he would have probably ended up spending his life in jail rather than being an A+ lister during his entire career. A studio almost went bankrupt paying off so many parents to keep quiet about what he did to their daughters. Our actor was the true definition of A+ list and he made box office hits and classics that will never stop being discussed. He was in charge of casting for all of his movies and you can be sure there would be a large number of teen and pre-teen girls auditioning for parts that didn’t even fit in with the story. He frequently cut the scenes out they shot but just wanted to audition them and shoot with them and have sex with as many as he could. The number of illegitimate kids this guy had would probably make our heads spin. It has to be at least a dozen and probably none of the mothers were over the age of 16. That was pretty much his cut off point.. He wanted nothing to do with any teen over 16. This guy was a sick guy who didn’t even bother hiding his love of young women but he was so popular and made so much money that people just shrugged it off and just said it was him being him. The payoffs were primarily to pay for the child’s future, but there were more than a few times where a girl was injured while having sex with our actor because he didn’t take no for an answer. The thing that was really disturbing is how many parents were willing to let their daughters film with him even when they knew his reputation or what he was going to do to their daughters. They let them spend the night or week with the guy.
Errol Flynn
NOTE: But soft, what light thro' yonder window breaks? 'Tis the fair doctrine, that shines like the sun Arise, fair doctrine, and kill the envious cease and desist, Who is already sick and pale with grief over lost revenue, That thou their former maids and men art far more fair than he: Be not their maid, as they are envious and angry; Their vestal livery is but sickly and green And none but fools can bear it, but cast it off When the autoplay begins to keen!
Having some business, do entreat thine eyes To know that these words were not mine But the sole proprietorship is owned By the keeper of the crazy And the keeper of the days And the keeper of the nights And the holder of the dots And the keeper of the nets.
No, I will weep no more for lost gossip sites. In such a night To shut me out of pithy commentary? Pour on with the mimosas; I will endure here with congenial company. In such a night as this? O Bacon Man, O Enternsl! Your old kind Seven of Eleven, whose anarchist heart gave all— O woe to CDAN, that way madness lies; let me shun that; No more of that.
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. OH! And that whole public domain thing.
* Based on King Lear by Williams Shakespeare written between 1603 and 1607. Since he's been dead several hundred years, I doubt he'll come after me, but ya know, we're a litigious society.
Did you know that some people think that the works attributed to William Shakespeare were in fact written by Sir Francis Bacon? Shakespeare --> Bacon --> Bacon Man --> Enty. Coincidence? I think not.
DEAR GOD I am finally regaining some sobriety...what did I miss? LOL Looks like I have a big day of catching up tomorrow. Happy New Year to my internet family
Same here. I have SO MUCH reading to do tomorrow. I already have my mimosa ingredients ready & chilling in the fridge. Happy New Year to my fellow Anarchists!!
Thanks to Seven and Jason for the most entertaining day I've had in a while. And thanks to the Fair Use Doctrine, which may be the only law in the United States that makes me laugh in a good way.
BTW did anyone else's Facebook page get hit with more than a few posts by KJE? I guess I had followed KJE's FB page back when & forgot about it until today (okay technically yesterday). I've never seen a post from Him/her in all the time we'd been "friends". Suddenly a shit storm of them.... Weird.
In the Happy New Year post on that site, commenter Not In The Mood says:
"It would have been a happier New Year if you hadn’t completely f*cked the site up. Why are you forcing us to jump through hoops in order to navigate the place now? How is that “growing pains” when it’s a huge step backwards in terms of just everyday functionality? There are myriad other problems with the site too but I won’t bother because you have to realize what they are and precious little has been done to improve things even though it’s been awhile now. I will add that the site is frickin UGLY now too. Like you care.. “I am grateful for all of you..” Yeah, well, like always, actions speak much louder than words."
It really is too bad, you know. They obviously know there's a problem, but I can't figure out why they won't revert back to the old setup. Misplaced pride? Delusion? Costs too much to do it?
They lost so many fans over it. I wonder if they have made the decision to ride it out and that new commenters will come in and replace the ones who left. The window of opportunity is closing on reverting back & wooing back the regulars. Heck, even Coke-Cola had to grovel after the new Coke fiasco. It happens. But this reveal day should have been much bigger and better. 35+ reader photos? 10--20 comments on each reveal? It's such a rapid decline.
Okay, who was the smartass who pointed out that KJE forgot to thank Anarchy? lol
Seriously, though, thanks to Outie for setting you up this blog and thanks to Seven & Jason for their posts (and saving my phone from crashing on CDAN's supposedly improved site.) It's all much appreciated!
Good god get over yourselves. So you hate Cdan. Presumably most of you are adults? It's a gossip blog. Nothing more. You've got your nice little blog here. ^5 VIP. You even answer your own blinds. Good call. Build a bridge and get over it.
THANK YOU Seven and JBE. Got caught up this morning. And thanks to whoever posted that comment from KJE's site about how he screwed it up. Amen sistah. Get thee over to Anarchy. Cheers, BW
Happy 2015, Anarchists!
ReplyDeleteSo Outtie started this Anarchy post and it seems like a good place to stick the Foxella reveals so they don’t clog the comments on the Instagram post. I love Outtie. (And I am not Outtie.)
As my belated Christmas gift to you and Outtie, I’m subjecting myself to that other place and posting the reveals (and only the reveals, the BIs come from Foxella). Now in case you’re reading this, Kim Jong Enty, once again – I am NOT Outtie and I am copy/pasting this with attribution to your site and with commentary in line with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that material may be quoted as long as it is substantially changed in line with the purpose of the quote – in this case, a whole lotta snark. ‘Kay, boo?
This first one is a batch because they're kind of boring and obvious.
Blind Items Revealed (BIR) #5 – Mr Zzzzzzzzz
You always know Mr X blinds are going to be like knock knock jokes. Orange you glad you’re not a banana? What does that even mean? Of course I’m glad I’m not a banana but if I was a banana, how would I know to not be glad I wasn’t an orange? Wouldn’t that imply bananas have brains? If that’s the case, vegetarians are going to have a really bad new year.
So anyway, today’s BIR from the Mattress King comes via the K-Klan.
September 29, 2014
What B-list actress, model and celebrity spawn was overheard saying to one of her friends “Who the hell did she f**k to get that job?” She being that B-list reality star sibling.
Riley Keough/Kendall Jenner
I was going to make these separate but I’m fresh out of Breathe Right strips to give to Mr X, so let’s just condense them. BIR#4 is about Mimi’s ex who I didn’t know was an actor (wasn’t he a reality star or something day before yesterday?) and that guy who saw The Wiz in grade school and thought it was a good stage name. And you know what? I’m still bitter because in the original, we thought Mr X had gone to the great mattress in the sky. Hmph.
September 29, 2014
In an irony of ironies, which B-list mostly television actor/host sold some drugs to that B-list rapper whom he now has made enemies with?
Nick Cannon/Wiz Khalifa
BIR #3 with Mr Who - I still don’t know who this is or why they stage publicity stunts, but the misspellings of their name in the original (Insanity Cane!) was amusing.
August 8, 2014
Which girl group/reality stars are hoping to get another reality show by staging some wacky publicity stunts? Nobody will probably pay attention, though.
Danity Kane
A Kardashian reveal? 2014 was a slow gossip year for KJE...
** NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must do so with the purpose of substantial change, such as commentary. SevenofEleven, the commenter who still is not Outtie, retains no rights to the original work and offers all attribution to the pretend bacon lawyer/owner of the web site crazy days and nights dot net, and retains all rights to the snark.
DeleteLOL ... you're very funny, Seven!
DeleteKeep 'em coming!!! :-)
Seven - you're the best! Cracking my ass up, as always. Happy New Year to you.
DeleteAwesome Seven, cheers for saving me from visiting that loathesome site.
DeleteSo our first non-Mr X BIR does not bode well because it ends with “last one of her for today”. Crap, that means there are multiples for her. One assumes it will be someone who filed for divorce or got engaged or got married or had sinus surgery recently. One would be right if they guessed divorce, KimmiJong* adores a juicy divorce story.
ReplyDeleteSeptember 7, 2014
This married A list female celebrity chef was offered a spot on RH-NY. At this point she has not said no, but I can’t imagine her saying yes. She doesn’t want her baggage aired in public.
Giada (last one of her for today)
And in the spirit of condensation (heh), I’m going to condense all Giada BIRs into this one comment thread just because you don’t have to click on multiple headlines to get the answer or read the comments and BONUS, I won’t threaten you if you don’t read it exactly the way I want you to. I mean, you can read it in your email (because Blogger lets you follow conversations) or you can read it on your phone (because AG is mobile friendly) or you can read it on your macbook in front of the Netflix fireplace (I guess….). Toast to Outtie (who is still not me)!
*name changed because I got new socks for Christmas
NOTE: item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must have some redeemable value other than its original purpose and I think snark is a redeeming value. SevenofEleven who is still not Outtie gives full attribution for these words to the person who tweeted a really tasteless joke last year and runs a website called crazy days and nights, which - according to its disclaimer - is a site of conjecture, rumor, and fiction.
From this reveal, I take it that the Supreme Commander of the People’s Republic of AdsLand* doesn’t really like Marilyn Manson’s ex.
ReplyDeleteAugust 15, 2014
This former A- list mostly television actress who had one hit show on an almost network and now seems to wander from project to project while making sure she gets her photo taken by paps several times a week was confronted by actual fans earlier this week but our actress refused to sign any photos that included photos of any of her co-stars from that popular show. Considering how hammered she was you probably couldn’t make out her scrawl anyway.
Rose McGowan
*name changed because mimosa time, baby!
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine which states that works reprinted must do so with the purpose of substantial change, such as commentary. SevenofEleven, the commenter who still is not Outtie, retains no rights to the original work and offers all attribution to the pretend bacon lawyer/owner of the site that goes by crazy days and nights dot net, and retains all rights to the snark.
This one is kind of dumb because Oatmeal Schilling (the main character on Orange is the New Black) openly dated Carrie Brownstein. There are even photos of them – in Kim Young Enty’s* words, “canoodling” – at parties.
ReplyDeleteFun factoid, though: Carrie’s co-star on Portlandia, Fred Armisen, ex-husband of Mad Men star Elisabeth Moss (who famously said that her marriage to Fred was “traumatic and awful and horrible”) was Natasha Lyonne’s (Nicky Nichols on OITNB) date for all of the Emmy parties this year!
August 9, 2014
This B+ list kind of television actress is not allowed to date anyone. No one. Her handlers want her ready for the right kind of publicity match. Meanwhile she wanders around parties and events with no one but a publicist.
Taylor Schilling
*name changed because I had an orange at breakfast (Mimi told me it counts if the orange is squeezed into a flute and topped with bubbly, only 4 servings of fruit left to go in the day!)
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine and without Outtie's prior knowledge and with a lot of snark because my cat just bit my leg. Original words in italics are directly attributed to the gossip website crazydaysandnights.net, the other stuff can be used to answer Jeopardy! questions.
I feel like these reality ones should get a comment section of their own because I’m always scratching my head and thinking, “Who?”
ReplyDeleteWith this one, I’m adding “cares?” to that question.
August 9, 2014
Apparently this future Bachelor is a little wanting in the endowment department according to a recent bedroom partner.
Chris Soules
NOTE: Item reprinted in accordance with the Fair Use Doctrine, which states that reprinting is allowed as long as the value of the reprinted item is not the same as the item itself, which it obviously isn't because the two-liner attached to it is worth at least half a taco more, and is attributed to the source, which it is, it's that website crazy days and nights dot net.
A couple of fly-bys.
ReplyDeleteSince I am not a tweener and not closely related to any tween girl, I don’t really know anything about this guy, except for one interesting tidbit: yesterday, Outtie posted that Christine Cavanaugh passed away (RIP!). Christine played Mrs Remo, the wife of the injured hockey player that Jerry Maguire represents in the movie Jerry Maguire (duh). Anyway, remember Steve Remo’s son Jesse – the one who told Jerry this was his dad’s fourth concussion and then told Jerry to f* off when Jerry tried to play it off like Dad was fine, it was all good? That was Drake Bell. According to KJE, Drake tries to make himself known via controversy, it doesn't work, so he makes himself seen in public a lot and uses that to pick up women. (I'm trying to figure out how he'd pick up women if he wasn't seen in public... OKCupid?)
One of those 4 for Friday BIs says that Evan Rachel Wood cheated on Ellen Page by sleeping with a (GASP!) guy to get a role in a Marvel movie. OK.
An Unbelievable Kindness
ReplyDeleteBIR #5 – Kindness
I wish I could believe this but Kumquat’s* Kindness BIs are just so far out in left field, they’re barely believable. Their own personal Jesus didn’t send his former castmate Angela Chase flowers or a card, no, he sent a congrats note (a year after the baby was born) AND he donated $50,000 work of diapers and formula to local charities. Right.
Surprise! The Revenge of Angela Chase, featuring Jared Leto with a Mohawk http://www.vice.com/read/the-revenge-of-angela-chase
*name changed because the foam on my cappuccino is awesome and I did it myself
NOTE: item wasn’t reprinted so neener neener neener.
I remember this one because I thought for sure that a gossip blogger would know the definition of a roman a clef (a fictionalized version of real events, ala Valley of the Dolls or any Jackie Collins book). Apparently Jamie Cheesesteak Kennedy, who dated Jennifer Love Hewitt for a year, is trying to get around a confidentiality agreement by writing a book about their relationship. Blogger thinks it will be really good. I think a ghost whispered that to them.
ReplyDeleteIn better news, a roman a clef about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes was published – and the author hasn’t gone missing yet!
Katie's Wild Ride
*name changed because I yawned
NOTE left in my other jacket
Has anyone seen JLH since she had her baby? I was just thinking about that the other day, because....well, I don't know why.
DeleteShe used to be papped all the time, but since giving birth she's been nowhere. Hopefully because she's found something more worthwhile than publicity.
Yep; saw her the other day (in print) filming for Criminal Minds - she's joined their regular cast.
DeleteI'd love to see JLH join the cast of Mistresses ... now that hideous Alyssa Milano has gone, a vacancy has been created ... and as JLH's husband is also on the show (Brian Hallisay), they could both make the trip to film the show on the new set in Canada.
Deletei heard she hasn't really bonded w/ the baby
DeleteOh Sugar! How sad, if true.
DeleteNic Cage is one of those actors who is just eccentric enough that you can slap a BI on them at any time. Just ‘Kuz Enty* once said that Nic shares his girlfriend with his son or something like that, and that he owes a bunch of money to some shady people. So this week’s BIR slap on ol’ Nic is that he is hair challenged, wears a cowboy hat to a truck stop to meet a hooker, sometimes puts on a fake mustache, and “thinks people can’t recognize him” because JKE ALWAYS knows what the celebs are thinking.
ReplyDelete*name changed because I just remembered there’s no garbage delivery today
*NOTE provided by someone's mom
I am enjoying these reveals as well as listening to Terry Gross's interview of Neil Patrick Harris. He's talking about his outting by Perez Hilton among other things. He's such a wonderful guy and talks about how he felt it to be disrespectful to his husband David to hide his relationship. That's such a beautiful thing.
ReplyDeleteThey seem like a lovely couple.
DeleteDavid was dreadful on E! though ... he was okay on that A List Listings show he fronted for them, but terrible on the actual news show.
neil begged E! to give david a job b/c he was sick of him just laying around the house spending his money.. apparently people on set of himym were constantly referring to david as his boy toy and such
Delete“Rocky Mountain Oysters”
ReplyDeleteEven Enternational Supahstahs* have to phone it in sometimes. In this BIR, Kate Moss kneed Marky Mark in his man bits because he tried to grope her in the trailer. Except… Kate Moss gave an interview in Vanity Fair that she was a nervous wreck during the shoot, was freaked out by her body because she was flat-chested, didn’t want to straddle the “buff” Mark, and had panic attacks. That does not sound like Barb Wire, that sounds like a 17 year old girl freaking out over being photographed nude. Nice try, ES.
Kate Moss nearly had a breakdown over straddling Marky Mark
*name changed because SUPAHSTAH!
NOTE was left in my jeans in the washer
“Magnificent Maleficent”
ReplyDeleteNow this one I know for a FACT is bs of the highest order. The Supreme Leader of the Putrid Creamsicle Color Theme* says that Angelina Jolie got a tropical disease and lost a bunch of weight and they thought it was Ebola. They hate Angelina Jolie the way I hate onions – remember when they said that Billy Bob Thornton was the first one to see Angie’s new boobs? I feel like Dr Cox saying, “You go there, champ. And go quickly.”
*name changed because my cat stretched
NOTE was chewed up by the dog
We were all expecting this one. Via Foxella, Sparkles Pattinson is being gaslighted by his girlfriend FKA Twigs. KStew tried to intervene but she had to go work on her truck or something.
ReplyDeleteFriends of the actor are convinced he is going to wake up in a few months and realize he has no money left
January 1, 2015
This actor is probably A-/B+.
He was A+ at one point but it was strictly franchise related.
He has not made the most of his opportunities post franchise.
He is foreign born. He is also being played for a fool by his new girlfriend.
She has somehow convinced the actor to buy a new home and put her on the title even though she won’t be contributing any money to the place.
Friends of the actor are worried because she has been cutting him off from those close to him and he has radically changed from a booze and bar kind of guy to a hard drug and night club kind of guy who has his girlfriend glued to his side at all times. He does everything she tells him from what to wear or not to wear and how he should look each day.
His ex, who is also an actress has tried to intervene but she is going through issues of her own and some very very big decisions she needs to make in the near future.
Friends of the actor are convinced he is going to wake up in a few months and realize he has no money left and a wife who will slowly kill him off.
Actor: Robert Pattinson
Girlfriend: FKA twigs
Ex: Kristen Stewart
*NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that does not sparkle in the dark
If her name is on the title when he misses a few payments, she might rethink the brilliance of that move.
DeleteI don’t know what “dirty enough” means but since this is the Pearl Clutcher On Duty*, I’m going to guess it means taking her shirt off with (GASP!) the lights on!!!!
ReplyDeleteApparently she was not dirty enough for him because after the deed she got out and he left
January 1, 2015
Nothing like being cheated on right before the holidays.
This former A list tweener who loves that her show was canceled so she can be the solo star she has always wanted to be was cheated on by her B list celebrity/performer boyfriend who had sex with a woman he met at a party in the car he was provided. Driver waited outside.
The celebrity/performer says he never lets hookups go back to his place or hotel until they get dirty for him.
Apparently she was not dirty enough for him because after the deed she got out and he left.
Ariana Grande
Big Sean
*name changed because my co-worker has a mini-figurine of Gerard Butler on his desk and those are some impressive abs
NOTE: item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that’s just dirty enough for ya
There was a party in the car he was provided and he met the woman there and then had sex with her? Must be a really big car.
DeleteCan't wait until this little twerp disappears from the fame game. Where was the blind that said she spoke in a little baby voice all the time? *Vomit*
DeleteI don't get it....having sex with him in his party limo wasn't dirty enough? What else would he have liked her to do?
DeleteMaybe she had recently showered. He likes them with skid marks and glitter!
DeleteWho knew there were “A list medical talk show hosts”?!
ReplyDeleteThis married A list medical talk show host was doing his best to get a woman to return to his hotel room.
December 31, 2014
This married A list medical talk show host was doing his best to get a woman to return to his hotel room.
He kept hitting on her the entire night and kept begging her to touch his pecs and they would make her know what it was like to be with a real man.
The guy was creepy.
Dr. Drew Paul Ordon
Show: The Doctors
NOTE: item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that will not beg you touch its pecs
One of the Jonas brothers didn’t hit on a girl. It’s the stuff that tween nightmares are made of.
ReplyDeleteHe said that he prefers men to women but did hang out with her all night
January 1, 2015
This probable one hit wonder with one of the most memorable songs of 2014 says that she got a key to the hotel room of this former A list tweener who is having a decent year and was waiting in his bed naked and he said that he prefers men to women but did hang out with her all night.
Just never made any kind of move.
Meghan Trainor
Nick Jonas
*name change not needed because I never pop my own champagne. I’m afraid I’ll shoot my eye out.
NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip blog aggregator that will not make any kind of move on you
Noooooo not Nick!
DeleteShe's not really the stereotypical hit maker, is she? She's kind of tubby, and her bleeding lipstick in her latest video really irks me :-/
Deleteif hear all....bass one more time !!!!!
Deletekill me now
Duh. Even my cat got this one.
ReplyDeleteThey had about $500K worth of returns last quarter
January 1, 2015
This reality family owns a clothing line.
They had about $500K worth of returns last quarter.
They could have donated the clothes but they got a bigger tax break by having them all destroyed, so decided to not help people other than themselves.
The Kardashians
NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip aggregator that will not fleece you or let you pet it.
I think the entire blind is sort of BS. The tax break analogy is incorrect. Destroying or giving away - no difference. They did not give the clothes away to a charity because they did not want poor people buying it Goodwill or whatever. Or 3rd world folks walking around wearing it. That would be the end of the clothing brand.
DeleteAlso, it's a really shitty thing to do to people who are already disadvantaged. Broke? Can't afford food, let alone new clothes? Here, we're going to make your misery complete by giving you these asstwat's clothes!
Kind of like Mugatu and his Derelique fashion line of models dressed like homeless people. Homeless people don't want to LOOK homeless!
DeleteRemember when National Lampoon’s Entward Vacation* stole that Page 6 line about two bigwigs sitting by each other and made it an epic battle for the ages between powerhouses BI? This time they swiped from MichaelK to make up a BI. Here’s MichaelK’s piece:
ReplyDeleteJames Franco doesn't care that he's a plagiarist
Here’s NLEV’s “BI”:
August 16, 2014
This A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee stole film footage shot by his assistant (for a film his assistant is making) and is now claiming it’s his original work for his upcoming film….
James Franco
*name changed because I couldn’t find my pen and realized only late into the morning that I’d stuck in my hair
*NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine that indicates items can be reprinted partially or in their entirety as long as the purpose of reprinting said item has changed. Since my purpose is not to profit from making things up based on other people’s work, I retain no rights to the original words that come from a site that says it publishes “rumors, conjecture, and fiction”.
Supposedly Charming Potato gave Ricky Martin a good time in exchange for two seconds in a video. And then he bragged about it. Remember when Original Recipe Enty* bragged about being friends with Britney Spears?
ReplyDeleteSinger was bragging to a couple of his friends about the time now A+ list actor gave him good head
December 31, 2014
Which foreign born, openly gay singer was bragging to a couple of his friends about the time that now A+ list actor gave him good head to get a job as a dancer in one of his music videos?
Ricky Martin
Channing Tatum
She Bangs video – he is in it for couple seconds
*name changed because now I want chicken
NOTE: Item from FOXELLA.COM, a gossip website that does not provide oral services
Channing would have been 19 when that video was filmed. Channing might even have been 18. Channing would be the type of guy my ex girlfriend would go for. Channing is a tool. I hate Channing.
Deleteso what you're saying is....
DeleteHah! Thanks Seven! I attempted to view blinds on ... um... some other site, but it's no fun without all of you.
ReplyDeleteI think everyone gave up trying to read that site after an hour.
DeleteI tried too, but it was no bueno. Thanks Seven for your recapping and Happy New Year everyone!! Side note: Not sure if this was already mentioned in a different note, but I was a little (not a lot) surprised to see certain folks posting on CDAN who quit posting there long ago. I know it's reveal day, but I thought that they were done with that site for good.
DeleteI should have kept reading the posts below before posting my comment...lol.
DeleteThanks for the reveals and the laughs, Seven.
ReplyDeleteOK, right now it's up to about 20. A reality couple from Jersey Shore named Ronnie and Sammi broke up because he cheated with her bestie. I'm guessing Ronnie is the guy or the names would be Ronni and Sammie, right? I'm guessing you were all on the edge of your seats waiting for that one, right?!
ReplyDeleteGuess which celeb has Alzheimer's and had a tribute for her canceled because she was too ill to attend? Mary Tyler Moore. I'm going to dip my toes in the sarcasm pool and comment on how terribly awesome it is to make a blind item out of Alzheimer's. Fun times!
I wonder if KJE will reveal who the actor is, who's suffering from Parkinson's (or was it Alzheimers?) ... someone who's working and struggling to keep up ... many guessed Tom Selleck
DeleteI posted this on another thread also, but I was curious what the attendance/comments numbers looked like on CDAN today, if anyone is over there. About how many reader photos did they end up with?
ReplyDeletebrenda - like Seven said the blind reveals are up to 20 and one post of reader pics (35). Not sure if views are accurate but around 2000 per item and the comments are around what they have been lately- 5-15. Not sure if the postings have stopped or not.
Deletefyi - other than one annoying pop up that has audio I don't have a problem accessing site. Not crazy about layout ect but, at least, technically it works from my laptop.
DeleteThere was about 40 reader photos. Not bad. Two years ago Enty had close to 200 though.
DeleteLong and boring reveal day over "there."
DeleteI'm not even sure how "truthy" those reader photos are. No one claimed any of them via comments (last I checked).
Very small group of known commenters.
This reveal day was even worse than that other one.
I popped in the other day and saw a mixed celeb and readers' photos post in the random photos ... I swear a couple of the readers' pics were from last year
DeleteGod bless Seven. And her perfectly steamed milk.
ReplyDeleteI am 100% with you on your recent opining on feminism as discussed by vapid, empty vessels. Smart women rule.
So has anyone determined what is actually legal to post? Like could I say that I took a mimosa fueled nap just now and had a dream that Shia LaBeouf sleeps fully attired including his combat footwear and is celibate? Or maybe I could tell you about the dream I had about Brit Brit where she was seated on her lonesome eating fro yo while a bunch of buff protectors pretended she was not there? Hmmm
ReplyDeleteAh, this one I have to reprint because a) it's just craziness and everyone knows Shia does this because he doesn't know how to change clothes and b) I really am the wholesome one!
ReplyDeleteAugust 20, 2014
Just when you thought this hanging on to A list mostly movie actor couldn’t get more strange, he does. His actress girlfriend tells friends that the couple never has sex any longer because the actor never takes his clothes off. Ever. He sleeps in his clothes and footwear and above the covers. He says it is so he can be ready.
Shia LaBeouf/Mia Goth
NOTE: reprinted via the Fair Use Doctrine, which says that wholesome snarkers like 7of11 (not to be confused with the convenience store or the borg lady, both ™ someone else) can reprint it as long as they give attribution (hi, crazydaysandnightsdotnet) and substantially change the purpose of the printing (in this case, for hangover standup filler).
Borg lady is 7 of 9 ;) Keep up the awesome updates, thank you!!
DeleteReady for....?
DeleteAnd how disgusting is it to sleep in your shoes?! You don't know what you possibly stepped in and have growing on the bottom of your sneakers...then you go bring that shit into bed with you?
Deleteside effect of molestation trauma i do believe
DeleteYou know what I was wondering? If I was an actress, say someone young like Anna Kendrick, and I was on the nookie hook for some actor, who would that actor be? It have to be someone I'd drop everything for since I'm jumping at his "back and call" [sic]. Hmmm
ReplyDeleteHear you @Elle. She's publicly dated very few and none of those options seems to fit the reveal.m
Deletei thought she was secretly "in the closet??"
DeleteSo, a singer ate by herself with 5 bodyguards who looked away from her and she didn't even have a phone or Star magazine to read while she was eating. She just stared vacantly at the bodyguards' backs (maybe she was reading their tattoos?) with a sad, vacant look in her eyes and never spoke a word to anyone, servers or fans. I feel like this is a Helen Keller thing where she carries a notepad around and writes "Cheeto Taco" on it since she's so drugged down she apparently can't even read. Once again, let us pay homage to Original Recipe Enty*, who said they would never said a negative thing about Britney Spears.
ReplyDelete*name changed because Brit looks great and makes way more money without having to issue cease and desist orders for vaguely unoriginal content
Also - the comments also said that it had already been revealed as 'taylor swift' previously.
DeleteCheeto taco! Snerk
DeleteForgot to add that the actor would really have to be someone who lives in another country and enjoys the company of adult film chicas
ReplyDeleteBefore you read this, you need to watch this. I'll wait.
ReplyDeleteCups.
Hey, you're back! OK, here's a good one: my favorite fellow resting b* face girl Anna Kendrick is caught in the sticky web of gossipy stuff that might be as authentic as a Kardashian charity drive. She's sleeping with a guy behind her boyfriend's back or something like that. Whatever, this needs a cheering up song!
I’ve got my ticket and I’m Anarchy bound
Cooler of mimosa for the way
And I sure would like some sweet company
And I’m glad you came – what do you say?
When I’m gone, when I’m gone
Oh, they’re gonna miss me when I’m gone
They’re gonna miss us by our hair
They’re gonna miss our snark everywhere, oh
They’re gonna miss since we’re gone.
Cashed your ticket for the long way ‘round
The site with the way better views
It’s got snark, it’s got news
It’s got original news
And it sure is prettier with you!
Since we’re gone, since we’re gone
Found a new place to call home
Don’t miss autoplays that scare
Don’t miss the ads everywhere
I don’t miss the place that’s gone.
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteApplause.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteWatch this one!
DeleteSorry - don't know how to make it a link. Guy does popular songs using household items as instruments. Really, really good. Trust.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Svg_fIoHij8
Love!!!
DeleteBravo!!!
ReplyDeleteOK, next one down: Jack Nicholson partied with his son and they shared four women. Ew. Also, it was cribbed from the DM so not really a BI or a reveal.
ReplyDeleteThen there are the reader photos, 35 of them.
Then the math-challenged Entern steps in. Dina Lohan walked away with three bottles of expensive champagne and broke a fourth on the way out.
Diane Keaton publicly supports Woody Allen but privately won't let him near her kids. I had to open a new browser window because the way the site loads, it gets stuck at page 2 or some crap (seriously, there about 36 scripts on that page) and in the new browser, I don't have AdBlock installed yet. The autoplay ad is for a workout video that asks "what do you do when you have a massive hangover?" and then starts showing you a bunch of yoga moves. BULL. Hair of the dog, baby, hair of the dog.
This next one involves someone I have loved since I was a kid. Pastor KJE* says that Meg Ryan has completely lost her marbles since her show wasn't picked up and her film project isn't doing too well, so she goes to confession 4-5 times in different NYC churches.
ReplyDeleteHere's what I'm trying to figure out: how does RevE know this? Is there a pap following her into every confession booth? Is he on the Roman Catholic Confessional email list? Is he posing as Eric Camden to get into the confessional booth? (Did Rev Camden wear a collar? I don't remember...)
I miss the Meg Ryan who was in love with Goose. Take me to bed or lose me forever!
*name changed because I have never been to confession
Delete4-5 times a day? Or week?
DeleteThat's nuts
*name not changed because I'm not Catholic
Oops, that was supposed to be a day!
DeleteWell geez, how many sins can you commit in a day?
DeleteThanks for clarifying my friend!
I think this might be it! Rosie O'Donnell wants to be top dog again on the View. Everyone is so shocked they immediately renounce all of their resolutions.
ReplyDeleteSome more Foxella items coming up but I'm just glad I don't have to see that red curtain anymore.
Whelp, I thought it was over because it's almost 4PM PST, but nope.
ReplyDeleteJust because I love the Marshall and Lily gif, I'm planting it here. So anyway, this one has to be reprinted because it doesn't make a whole lot of sense and Elizabeth Berkley speaks another language?
Fun fact: Jessie Spano's right eye is half-green and half-brown. This is called heterochromia (clutch your pearls, Grandma E*!).
August 21, 2014
This former tween actress who never quite recovered from her first movie role was at the airport the other day with her young child. A woman who barely spoke English was asking people how to get to a certain terminal. Most people were ignoring her or giving her answers she didn’t understand. The woman started crying and our actress stepped in and even though she was carrying her child, our actress walked the woman to the terminal which took about twenty minutes and then walked all the way back to her own terminal.
Elizabeth Berkley
*name changed because don't it make my brown eyes blue...
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine that allows for reprinting of items as long as the reprinting serves a use other than the reprinting, like not making money and actually being amusing. Full attribution to crazy days and nights dot net for the words in italics, the rest belongs to the borg lady's younger sister.
Seven of Eleven, you are freakin' awesome!! :D
ReplyDeleteSheesh, it's #22 now. Parker Posey cries because she can't get work repping products.
ReplyDeleteTori Spelling - who, as auntliddy points out, has Crohn's - is taking someone's product to stay skinny and KJE smells a lawsuit. I wonder if it smells like Bacon Frito farts. OH - and Tori's A list reality now.
I'm just reprinting this one because I don't get it. Who has the unusual name? "Tyga" or "Blac Chyna"? Did these people never have spelling tests in grade school?
August 21, 2014
I can’t wait until the day this C+ list celebrity with the very unusual name finds out her A list reality star “best friend” slept with the boyfriend of the C+ lister a couple of years ago while she was deciding who her next victim was going to be. So, yes, she stabbed her friend in the back and it is going to come out.
Blac Chyna/Kim Kardashian/Tyga
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is not only legal but also enjoyable.
NO ONE got this and guess why? Because it doesn't even make sense.
ReplyDeleteAugust 22, 2014
Look for this former A list reality star from multiple reality shows on multiple networks and cable channels to give the network whatever they want for her new show because she has already committed the money she thought was a sure thing for another season to another business she runs.
Nicole Richie
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is not only legal but also like a pot brownie in Colorado.
I thought her clothing line was moderately successful, and her husband has a regular gig on The Voice Australia. So why are they selling their Hollywood Hills house? They seem to be in a bit of a financial pickle. (They could be looking to upsize, but considering what I just said and the content of this Blind ...) ...
Deletedrugs are expensive and so is maintaining a lifestyle you can't afford..
DeleteHave you seen the prices on some of her jewelry? I wouldn't pay that much (for what you're getting). I'd say she's put a lot more $$ into the line than she's getting back, and what sugar bread said about drugs & lifestyle etc.
DeleteI guess it's pick on Britney day. Earlier she wasn't allowed to read and eat, now she's being forced to perform. I would like to take this moment to once again (I know, third time today!) remind everyone that Original Flavor E* really liked Brit.
ReplyDeleteAugust 22, 2014
This A+ list “singer” had to be convinced/threatened to go back on stage during a change in clothes the other night. The singer spent five minutes arguing and crying before reluctantly going back out.
Britney Spears
*name changed because black eyed peas!
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which basically says smart alecks like 7of11 can reprint them as long as the reprint is for a use such as criticism (snap!), commentary (snap snap!), and/or reporting (THREE SNAPS UP!). Being the stand-up gal and borger princess that she is, this commenter wants everyone to know the words in italics are attributed to the site crazy days and nights dot net. Y'all come back now, ya hear?
Seven, it's okay to take a break and breathe!!!
ReplyDeleteLOL ... girlfriend's on a roll!
Delete#27: Basement Baby and Elevator Terrorist Solange Knowles got drunk on the red carpet and was asked to leave.
ReplyDeleteAnd there was a tweet that there's ten more hours to go. I'm going to start a Kickstarter campaign to fund a mimosa making machine that will hand deliver them to me (and do the laundry).
I want more Basement Baby shenanigans in 2015!
DeleteSeven of Eleven, you're the bestest!
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNegative, definitely negative!
DeleteDo you think this might actually be the day KJE FINALLY realizes he done f-ed up his site but dang good and now decides it needs fixin'?
ReplyDeleteNaaaah.
Get this - Billy Bob Thornton and Jon Voight were at the same OITNB party and the only blind they could make of it was that Billy Bob is stalking Laura Prepon. I would've thought there be something like how Jon Voight flipped his wig when he saw BBT and yelled at him about Angie's new boobs or how dare he crush Jon's precious daughter's feelings or maybe ask him she was in bed because you know who's mind totally goes that way. But nope, stalking a $cio outside of the bathroom.
ReplyDeleteAugust 25, 2014
At a party this weekend this OITNB star who was on a long running show a few years ago spent all night dodging the advances of this B list mostly movie actor who has been flirting with television the past year. The actor, who used to be with an A+ list mostly movie actress would not leave the OITNB actress alone and at one point parked himself in front of the women’s restroom to wait for her.
Laura Prepon/Billy Bob Thornton/Angelina Jolie
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are awesome and reporting what someone else is reporting while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net) is like waking up next to Chris Hemsworth with a mimosa in Tahiti.
He parked himself? He sat down on the floor in front of the women's bathroom? With everybody watching? What a coot.
DeleteThe dancer guy who was Carrie's boyfriend on SatC (Mikhail Baryshnikov) had sex with Jessica Lange 20 minutes after meeting her and for the first year, they only had sex in the car. I hope the seats were heated.
ReplyDelete#30 - KINDNESS: Stifler's mom was a little drunk and took pity on three female autograph seekers and told the security guards at the party they were the network head's nieces. The security guard couldn't stop staring at her cleavage (not really) and let them all in (that did happen). Stifler's mom is nice.
I can totally relate to Jessica Lange....except I was a teenager and we both lived with our parents :/
DeleteJessica should hook up with Big Sean. Apparently he likes car sex too.
DeleteBut is she dirty enough for him?
DeleteIn Night and The City she did it with De Niro in a dirty alley. You never know.
DeleteOoO I forgot about that movie! Good call :p
DeleteHow was your NYE JBE?
DeleteIt was Okay. I was bushed by 1:30. How was yours, Gina?
DeleteWas okay! Home by 330, replied to some emails then of to sleep!
DeleteI love Jennifer Coolidge. It was so awesome of her to take these girls to the party.
DeleteI think when Jessica and Mikhail were doing it in the car, half of New York was doing it in the booths upstairs at Studio 54 (to put things in perspective).
DeleteWeren't Lange and Baryshnikov married too?
DeleteMaybe they divorced cause the sex life fizzled...not enough cars!
Not married, but have a kid together.
DeleteThis is the best post of my life
ReplyDeleteWhere is Wigs???
DeleteI think KJE had some goons kidnap Seven :(
ReplyDeleteOr the mimosa machine materialized...
DeleteKJE sent Chris Hemsworth to Seven's house to distract her. Maybe he can send Megan Fox to mine.
DeleteThis post is fucking AMAZING! *tears* KJE must fall.
ReplyDeleteSeven is allowed to you know, eat, drink her mimosa's and breathe....perhaps if anyone else feels inclined, they can fill in?
ReplyDeleteNo one said she couldn't do all of that, so chill.
Delete"So chill"? LOL
DeleteThree cheers for seven and outtie. What a way to start the new year!
ReplyDeleteOMG! I qam so glad I went to the bathroom before reading this thread! LMAO
ReplyDelete"am" jeez ^
ReplyDeleteHOLY CRAP, they're still not done! I know this is not a one-person show because seriously, I just stepped away to put the black eyed peas on (the food, not the music, though I do like Fergie and her husband) and make some rice and they came up with six more reveals. Since the bep has another half hour or so and alas, no mimosa machine or Chris Hemsworth (the only acceptable substitute) appeared at my door, here goes.
ReplyDeleteRemember Josh Lucas from Sweet Home Alabama? I don't either, I barely remember that movie, but he was my boxed wine bestie's (Reese, of course) husband that had she had to divorce to marry McDreamy. McCeaseNDesisty* says that Josh is still really good looking (yeah, guys say that all. the. time.) and was apparently sipping from well drinks because he drunkenly tried to convince his date that he was making out with another woman on friendly terms. I wonder if he yelled, "I'm an 'Merican citi-shen! I can make out with whomever ah want to!"
*named changed because I'm an American and can change names when I want to! with love, Laura Jean Poon's best friend
Not sure if anyone mentioned this already but on Twitter Enty said the reveals are going into tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteDo you think it's OK to take ibuprofen with champagne? Because I think I gave myself a Lucille Bluth-worthy eyeroll migraine at this one. This one also convinced me that at least one member of the new E-Crew* is the parent of a tweener. Here's basically how it went:
ReplyDeleteKatniss Everdeen: "I'm finally A+ list!"
Nick Hoult: "I'm only B+, damn it! I will have to figure out how to up my ratings on The Spreadsheet™!"
Bella: "I can help! Let me finish fixing my truck and coming on to my director and grumbling!"
Nick Hoult: "Jennifer, I know you're a superstar and an Oscar winner but the girl from Twilight is irresistable and I must have her. I hope that's OK."
Jennifer Lawrence: "Yeah, right."
Nick Hoult: "I can't wait!"
Peeta: "Give her some bread, she can't resist bread!"
Nick & Jennifer & KStew: "Shut up, Peeta!"
KJE: "Ha, I knew it!"
Gale: "They just want a good show. That's all they want. The odds were never in my favor. Ask Miley."
August 28, 2014
This couple had cheating issues on both sides. When the two briefly got back together they agreed to break up if either was going to cheat. The A+ list mostly movie actress was really surprised though when her B+ list mostly movie actor boyfriend came to her just a month after they had been dating again and said that he was going to inevitably have sex with this A- list mostly movie actress when they started filming together and so they should break up so he could start having sex with her right then instead of waiting. Apparently the A+ lister was crushed.
Jennifer Lawrence/Nicholas Hoult/Kristen Stewart
*name changed because EFFIE TRINKET!
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Criticism and commentary are like fake eyelashes, they just enhance what's already there while giving them attribution (hi, crazy days and nights dot net).
Whoops just read through. You're aware. Love the recaps makes it a lot easier.
ReplyDeleteNext up is a Kindness and guess who nailed the original out of the gate? That's right, yours truly who rarely gets one! Hold on, gotta refresh the celebratory mimosa! :D
ReplyDeleteOK, it's really long and I won't bore you but basically Sandra Bullock bought two school busses for her kids' school and then a week later gave her dinner reservations to a soldier and his wife and posed for photos with them. KJE has thrown shade at SandyB before because she was married to that aryan toad but they couldn't this time. Celebrate good times, come on!
(Also, I will confess that I still love While You Were Sleeping.)
That was a fun flick. I had such a thing g for her after SPEED.
DeleteI still have a thing for her!
Delete#34: Whitney Houston's daughter is "the biggest celebrity crack user" King Pipe E* has ever heard of (not Tiger Blood Sheen?) and "basically smokes crack 24/7" then sleeps it off and starts it up again. No word on dookie bubbles.
ReplyDelete#35: Opie's Jon Snow has a fashion designer boyfriend who called her fat. She's really private, though. And Grandmaster Penty* has hinted before she may be more into ladies so who knows from which orifice this erupted.
#35: Michael Bay hires foreign college students to be his "au pairs" and by "au pair" he means "au pair of my testes in your hand" or something like that. Nanny McE* better hope Michael Bay doesn't see this on their site and flip his notorious lid and send out a great big ol' Cease 'N Desist with a side of NOW. :D
*names changed because any time a Game of Thrones reference can be used is a wonderful, wonderful time
DeleteOh and that last one is #36. I'm getting hungry!
DeleteIf Bobbie Christina smokes crack 24/7, how can she sleep it off? Unless there's some sort of nocturnal crack infusion device, that's possible, especially in Tinsel Town.
Deletei saw side by side photos of chastain and ron howard's daughter and they looked exactly alike.. same nose , face shape, everything..hmmmm
Deletejessica snow indeed..
Thank you Seven for taking the time to post all of these!
ReplyDelete#37, I remember this one, they pulled it from Autograph magazine basically saying Will Ferrell is a douche who is mean to his fans. Will Ferrell teases his fans sometimes to see how far they'll go to get an autograph. As a guy who specializes in pushing boundaries for the sake of comedy (and I'm sorry, but I hated Anchorman 2), I could totally see him doing that and in fun, not being a Piven.
ReplyDelete#38: Following up Mr Meanie No Autographs For You is Ms I Go On Vacation with My Fans and leave voicemails for them Reese Witherspoon. Yeah, I don't buy it, either. The last line is "people truly love her" and you just know in your heart of hearts that's got some temp workers seething.
#39: Another Nick somebody is cheating on Iggy Plant Lady, who this time doesn't know about it.
#40 looks interesting.
Oh for goodness sake, that old story gets hashed, and rehashed. Nick is not cheating on Iggy.
DeleteFun fact: Iggy got her name by - her childhood pet (dog) named Iggy; Izalea is the street she grew up on in Mirumbumbee (sp?), a hippy sort of town by Byron Bay (Australia)
Isn't that the way you're supposed to get your porn name?
DeleteStepforded you just made my day. She's from Mullumbimby but I think you've spelled it how someone from NZ (like you) would spell it phonetically.
DeleteThis is for you, Seven.
ReplyDeleteNow I have to clear my Google search history.
@JBE!
DeleteI saw that movie referenced in blind #40. Kim B. didn't miss out on much. Except cakes. Kim B. missed out on many cakes.
ReplyDeleteLet me try this thing:
ReplyDelete#41, This former soft-core porn actress (who would switch off interviewers tape recorders when asked about a certain A+ list actor/writer/director she was dating) never broke up with said A/W/D when he cheated on her with a now unrecognizable A list award winning actress. She did break up with him when he slept with a popular TV/movie actress (who famously had words with a legendary comedic actor everyone loves) and is now co-starring on a hit(ish) CBS series with a man who was once married to this very A++ actress-now-director.
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. One can also read these items in the backwards talking voice of the dancing dwarf from Twin Peaks (which was a TV series before crazy days and nights dot net was a thing.)
Awesome, Jason! :-)
DeleteIf Seven wants to take a break we should continue on. Down with KJE!!!
DeleteGood job!
DeleteBeautiful!!
DeleteOne of the commentators complained about "the gross toe nail fungus ad" that can't be avoided. Fair use doctrine stipulates that toe nail fungus ad should be soaked it in bacon grease.
DeleteBut what's the answer?
DeleteKrista Allen - long suffering soft-core porn actress
DeleteGeorge Clooney - A+ list actor
Renee Zellweger - unrecognizable A list award winning actress
Lucy Liu - popular TV/movie actress
It's just like an algebra problem, once you know the answer, it seems so obvious.
DeleteOT: More of a public service announcement really...let's all learn from my mistake about 10 mins ago and NEVER try riding your spin bike in the dark...take it from me people!!
ReplyDeleteOh dear. Are we icing or heating?
DeleteOh we are icing!
DeleteMany years later I'm finally able to chuckle about the last time I said 'what does this button do' when operating a pressure cooker for the first time.
DeleteI ended up having to repaint the kitchen...
Hahaha oh man...so many things can go wrong with a pressure cooker...you're lucky you weren't leaning over it when u pressed that button :p
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DeleteThanks seven!
ReplyDelete#42, This ginger-haired foreign born singer paid a compliment to this asshole-singer's girlfriend (not sure why she would warrant any compliments, but whatever, this obviously is a very nice guy) and asshole said the guy could take her out if so inclined. Nice guy singer said "Nah, I'm good" and then asshole-singer got all asshole-y and wanted to start a thing. Nice guy couldn't believe what was happening.
ReplyDeleteEd Sheeran/Chris Brown/Karrueche Tran
Oh, yeah - NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Also for use on sites that don't advertise toe fungus remedies (crazy days and nights dot net).
DeleteGinger Hobbit was trying to avoid exposure to untreated toe nail fungus.
DeleteOver to Seven...
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DeleteHe better leave my ginger hobbit alone! I SEE FIRE!!!
Delete#40 - I'm trying to figure out this one works. The way it reads, Kim Basinger - who, according to YogaEnt is famous for one role and for being Hilaria Baldwin's husband's ex-wife - was way too demanding for an indie flick and wanted three cakes a day, so the indie producers got two Oscar noms/winners for the roles instead. Was Catwoman supposed to play both roles? And 9.5 weeks was not her only big role, she was in Batman and LA Confidential, both fairly substantial. BTW, the flick was "At Middleton" and Roger Ebert gave it 2 stars with this line that shows that Entern Spielberg is not quite up to snuff on what a smart script looks like.
ReplyDelete""At Middleton" is the just the sort of trite if inoffensive diversion that barely tiptoes into theaters before landing in the cable and video-on-demand listings. And Garcia and Farmiga, as good as they can be in the right roles, aren't doing themselves or their careers any favors with this sort of C-level effort."
The Bored Item here:
September 7, 2014
This former A list mostly movie actress who kind of fell off the planet when she and the A list mostly television actor got divorced more than a decade ago has had her chances to work. Really famous for one iconic movie, the actress recently got a chance to star in an independent movie with a small budget and a great script. The budget was tiny but our actress wanted two separate trailers and cakes, yes cakes, delivered three times a day each day of shooting and had specific dimensions and flavors for each cake. Yeah, the producers passed and ended up landing two Academy Award winners/nominees for the lead roles.
Kim Basinger/Vera Farmiga/Andy Garcia
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. Did you know there was a guy named Stanley Milgram who conducted experiments to study the difference between obedience to authority and obedience to personal conscience? Anarchy Research 101 thanks to tentodsthgindnasyadyzarc!
And.KJE is now done for the day. Ten more hours of blinds tomorrow. He gave shout-outs to Michael K,, Celebitchy and AGC - nothing for us though. :(
ReplyDeleteI would have dropped dead if he did
DeleteThank you 7! And Jason, too. This was far more enjoyable than years-past and I was spared from going over to the POS site or choosing to skip it altogether. On a side note - wasn't it Michael K who tweeted his disgust at GrinchyEnty as he unfollowed him? Oh and another Thanks to Outtie for providing the space & everything
ReplyDeleteHuh? Do tell. I have a hard time believing Michael K would throw shade at CDaN. Seriously.
Delete#43 looks to be the last one of the day. I finished the Brut and tomorrow is a new day!
ReplyDeleteSo in this one, they're actually naming the abuser rather than the abused, and saying Errol Flynn, aka Zorro, aka dead guy who can't defend himself, had a thing for underage females.
September 24, 2014
If this actor was alive today he would have probably ended up spending his life in jail rather than being an A+ lister during his entire career. A studio almost went bankrupt paying off so many parents to keep quiet about what he did to their daughters. Our actor was the true definition of A+ list and he made box office hits and classics that will never stop being discussed. He was in charge of casting for all of his movies and you can be sure there would be a large number of teen and pre-teen girls auditioning for parts that didn’t even fit in with the story. He frequently cut the scenes out they shot but just wanted to audition them and shoot with them and have sex with as many as he could. The number of illegitimate kids this guy had would probably make our heads spin. It has to be at least a dozen and probably none of the mothers were over the age of 16. That was pretty much his cut off point.. He wanted nothing to do with any teen over 16. This guy was a sick guy who didn’t even bother hiding his love of young women but he was so popular and made so much money that people just shrugged it off and just said it was him being him. The payoffs were primarily to pay for the child’s future, but there were more than a few times where a girl was injured while having sex with our actor because he didn’t take no for an answer. The thing that was really disturbing is how many parents were willing to let their daughters film with him even when they knew his reputation or what he was going to do to their daughters. They let them spend the night or week with the guy.
Errol Flynn
NOTE:
But soft, what light thro' yonder window breaks?
'Tis the fair doctrine, that shines like the sun
Arise, fair doctrine, and kill the envious cease and desist,
Who is already sick and pale with grief over lost revenue,
That thou their former maids and men art far more fair than he:
Be not their maid, as they are envious and angry;
Their vestal livery is but sickly and green
And none but fools can bear it, but cast it off
When the autoplay begins to keen!
Having some business, do entreat thine eyes
To know that these words were not mine
But the sole proprietorship is owned
By the keeper of the crazy
And the keeper of the days
And the keeper of the nights
And the holder of the dots
And the keeper of the nets.
No, I will weep no more for lost gossip sites. In such a night
DeleteTo shut me out of pithy commentary? Pour on with the mimosas; I will endure here with congenial company.
In such a night as this? O Bacon Man, O Enternsl!
Your old kind Seven of Eleven, whose anarchist heart gave all—
O woe to CDAN, that way madness lies; let me shun that;
No more of that.
NOTE: item reprinted under the Fair Use Doctrine, which is widely defined to include items reprinted for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, or research. OH! And that whole public domain thing.
* Based on King Lear by Williams Shakespeare written between 1603 and 1607. Since he's been dead several hundred years, I doubt he'll come after me, but ya know, we're a litigious society.
Did you know that some people think that the works attributed to William Shakespeare were in fact written by Sir Francis Bacon? Shakespeare --> Bacon --> Bacon Man --> Enty. Coincidence? I think not.
DEAR GOD
ReplyDeleteI am finally regaining some sobriety...what did I miss? LOL
Looks like I have a big day of catching up tomorrow. Happy New Year to my internet family
Well done!
ReplyDeleteSame here. I have SO MUCH reading to do tomorrow. I already have my mimosa ingredients ready & chilling in the fridge.
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year to my fellow Anarchists!!
Thanks to Seven and Jason for the most entertaining day I've had in a while. And thanks to the Fair Use Doctrine, which may be the only law in the United States that makes me laugh in a good way.
ReplyDeleteSee you all tomorrow!
Thanks Seven and Outtie for making the reveals fun, for once! Funk KJE.
ReplyDeleteBTW did anyone else's Facebook page get hit with more than a few posts by KJE? I guess I had followed KJE's FB page back when & forgot about it until today (okay technically yesterday). I've never seen a post from Him/her in all the time we'd been "friends". Suddenly a shit storm of them.... Weird.
ReplyDeleteI don't follow KJE, but I'm not surprised the push is on. I suspect that he/she/they are trying to recoup readership, thus the full court press.
DeleteIn the Happy New Year post on that site, commenter Not In The Mood says:
ReplyDelete"It would have been a happier New Year if you hadn’t completely f*cked the site up. Why are you forcing us to jump through hoops in order to navigate the place now? How is that “growing pains” when it’s a huge step backwards in terms of just everyday functionality? There are myriad other problems with the site too but I won’t bother because you have to realize what they are and precious little has been done to improve things even though it’s been awhile now. I will add that the site is frickin UGLY now too. Like you care.. “I am grateful for all of you..” Yeah, well, like always, actions speak much louder than words."
And the hits just keep on coming.
Word.
DeleteIt really is too bad, you know. They obviously know there's a problem, but I can't figure out why they won't revert back to the old setup. Misplaced pride? Delusion? Costs too much to do it?
DeleteThey lost so many fans over it. I wonder if they have made the decision to ride it out and that new commenters will come in and replace the ones who left. The window of opportunity is closing on reverting back & wooing back the regulars. Heck, even Coke-Cola had to grovel after the new Coke fiasco. It happens. But this reveal day should have been much bigger and better. 35+ reader photos? 10--20 comments on each reveal? It's such a rapid decline.
Okay, who was the smartass who pointed out that KJE forgot to thank Anarchy? lol
ReplyDeleteSeriously, though, thanks to Outie for setting you up this blog and thanks to Seven & Jason for their posts (and saving my phone from crashing on CDAN's supposedly improved site.) It's all much appreciated!
Good god get over yourselves. So you hate Cdan. Presumably most of you are adults? It's a gossip blog. Nothing more. You've got your nice little blog here. ^5 VIP. You even answer your own blinds. Good call.
ReplyDeleteBuild a bridge and get over it.
Hi, Enty!
DeleteHi 7!
DeleteWOW, that was amazing! Thank you Seven :)
ReplyDeleteDamn, good job Seven and Jason!
ReplyDeleteFinally just got through this, so much for working today, ha. Seven, I tip my hat to you! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteTHANK YOU Seven and JBE. Got caught up this morning. And thanks to whoever posted that comment from KJE's site about how he screwed it up. Amen sistah. Get thee over to Anarchy. Cheers, BW
ReplyDeleteGreat job Seven and JBE! I just read them all the commentary was killer :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the revels.
ReplyDelete